Why is he doing this? Why isn’t he fighting back? Did he know all along he’d be handing himself over?
Did he fuckinglieto me?
Those grey eyes pin me in place. “You know how men say they would kill for the one they love?”
I shake my head so hard it hurts.
It feels like a hole has just erupted in my chest, threatening to swallow me into a hollow existence.
No. I’m not listening to this. He can’t talk like that; this can’t be it.
We can get him back; we just need to replan everything. We know more now than we ever did. Rex and Dawson will be here soon, and we’ll fucking get him back from whatever dumb deal he’s made.
My life isn’t worth his. It’snothingwithout him.
“I’m not like other men though, am I, darling?” His chest rises and falls as he strains through the words, and my sob finally breaks free.
“No.”
“You see, whilst I’d enjoy nothing more than killing every fucker here…I’d also give my life for you too.”
My heart fractures into something irreparable. “No, Saint—”
The next words from him leave strangled, and when he spits the blood onto the white-dusted ground, an unfathomable sense of dread takes me under. “If it meant you stayed safe, forever.”
I’d give my life if it meant you’d never come to harm again.
He’s dragged away from me towards the car. It feels like my soul is clawing its way out of my body to follow him, teeth bared and talons sharpened as it tears through bone and flesh.
My upper body heaves forward as my hands fist in the blood-soaked snow. I hear the tut from the Judge as he turns his back on me, and my gun burns beside me. It’d be so easy to take him out with one shot, then fucking end George. But their men are littered everywhere. I can’t risk Saint.
A metallic taste fills my mouth as I bite down hard on my tongue, battling to keep the guttural sob contained.
Car doors slam shut, each bang causing my body to jolt nervously, and my head rises when George calls out my name. His laugh grates along my skin.
Until I don’t feel anything at all.
“Don’t worry, Indie. He actually won’t suffer too long. In fact…”
Bang.
Bang.
My scream shudders the earth beneath my palms.
28
Indie
i love you - billie eilish
Theysaydeathispeaceful.
That it frees you from life’s burdens, silences the troubles and gives you an eternity of calmness.
But make sure you live your life to the fullest, regardless if that’s tempting; enjoy every second spent alive, waste no time with the what ifs or regrets, smile through the dark days.
And when the other half of your soul dies, the whole reason for you living, a part of you will go with it. The world darkens to a colour you never could imagine. And death is all you wish for.
