have so much control over my life?”
“No, I think that’s pretty normal. When you’re in a family, other people’s needs and wants matter.
The difference is my brothers care about me too. They care if I’m happy, and they work to make sure
I’m in a good place, too.” I brush the hair back from her face and tuck it behind her ear. “What made
you go back out and pick one?”
She scrunches up her face. “I think it was more of a rebellion at first. Moving into the dorms,
going to college and then getting my own place, all of those things were little rebellions, but for some
reason, getting a dog felt like the biggest screw-you ever. It’s probably not a mature reason to get a
dog, but there it is.” She smiles. “Birdie was the smallest in the box, but she had this white patch on
her chin that made her look like an old man. I was petting them all, but she was such a little stinker,
pulling on her sibling’s tails, or biting my thumb. She had an attitude. I really respected her for that.”
I smile, because how can you not? Of course, she picked the dog with attitude. She sees herself as
a quiet, awkward woman, which admittedly she is. But she also seems to search out people with
opinions and attitudes. Her assistant is a perfect example.
“She went with me everywhere. She even came to work with me. My boss didn’t love it, but I
made a good argument about morale, so he let it go. Everyone there loved her.” There’s a slight bite
to the word ‘her’. She’s already told me how separate she felt in the world. “She’d prance into a
room and make everyone smile. Even at the end…”
I tuck her tighter, wishing I could take away the pain in her voice. She snuggles in, and my heart
pounds because she’s letting me comfort her. Other than Jonas, I’ve never done this for anyone. But
being there for Maya, being someone she can lean on, makes me feel ten feet tall.
“What happened to her?”
She wets her lips, her gaze far away. “She got cancer. My Vet told me that the cancer was
aggressive and she only had a few months left, but I couldn’t…I had to try. So I found this amazing
holistic vet, and they tried all kinds of treatments. They gave me three extra years with her.”
“When did she die?”
“A week before I contacted you.”
I sit up straighter and, with one finger, tip her chin up so I can meet her eyes. “She’s why you
wouldn’t accept the job?”
“Yeah. I didn’t want to move her.”
