Colt frowns, letting my hand go and leaning back. “You done?” he asks, waving at our mostly empty plates.
“Yeah, I lost my appetite.” I’m so mad at myself for letting this get to me. I ruined our dinner. Tears prick my eyes in disappointment.
He nods, texting something on his phone, then stands, digging his wallet out. He pulls a stack of hundreds out, dropping them casually on the table, then takes my hand and helps me out of my chair. There’s a glint of something in his eye that makes me hold my breath.
He pulls me across the room, completely ignoring the table of women at the front window, and into the crisp air outside. He spins me into his body, backing me up until I’m pressed against the glass. He moves glacier slow, giving me plenty of time to object, to think. But I don’t, because that glint in his eye has turned into a smolder. No way do I want to miss this.
As his lips take mine, we both groan, desperate for the connection. There hasn’t been enough of this. Before I was a mom, finding time to fool around with my boyfriend was a nonissue. There was no one to answer to. Now, along with Mia to think of, I find myself with a massive, nosey family. There is always someone around.
Now, though, with Colt’s weight pressing me to the window, I find I don’t care. I don’t care who’s watching and I really don’t care what they’re thinking. I’m all about feeling, and right now, I feel amazing. And hot, despite the icy wind biting at my skin.
Tunneling my hands through Colt’s hair, I pull him closer, drowning in want. I catalog sensations. The rub of his jeans against my thin tights. The weight of him against my stomach. The strength of his arms as they pull me closer, making it clear I am not going to escape him.
Not that I want to.
We finally separate, panting, our lips only a millimeter from connecting again.
“I just want to be very clear,” he rasps, leaning his forehead on mine. “I want you so fucking much. You better not doubt that. But I’m a caveman, and rubbing how fucking much I want you in the face of anyone who doubts it is just a bonus. You got me?”
I nod, but I have no idea what I’m nodding to. My brain is completely offline. All I caught is ‘want’.
Me too.
But as he spins me and tucks me under his arm, I see. Because right there, right on the other side of the window that I was just pressed up against, is the table of mean girls. I can’t stop the belly laughs rolling through me at the glimpse of their dumbfounded expressions. I give them a little wave, then lean into Colt for the short walk back home.
Colt tugs me across the lobby, grunting at the doorman, then the concierge at the desk. Scanning his palm for the private elevator, he tugs me on, swinging me into the corner, caging me in with his arms. We’re close, so close, but not touching. It’s maddening. My blood is racing from our kiss and the rush to get back here.
He dips his head, tucking his cheek next to mine. I can barely feel the brush of his beard as he whispers to me. “I can’t wait any longer Evie. Nick’s got Mia. He’s in your apartment. We’re going to mine, and we’re locking the fucking door, and we’re not stopping. For anything. I will have you under me tonight, Evie. You’re not leaving my fucking bed until morning, and maybe not even then. Any objections?”
On my third try, I manage to get my words out. “Good plan. Yep.”
His rough chuckle floats against my skin, making me shiver. I feel like every hair on my body is standing straight up, like I’m touching one of those static electricity globes at the science center.
He backs away, eyes locked on mine until he’s pressed to the far wall. We stare, silently, both lost in the anticipation, the need.
When the elevator opens on his floor, he prowls off, unlocking his door, waiting for me to slide past him. I drop my purse and coat, toeing off my shoes, eyes on him as he drops his coat and kicks his shoes off. Moonlight spears through the floor-to-ceiling windows, sending shadows across Colt’s harsh features.
Something about the way he stalks toward me sends flutters of panic through me. I step back, and Colt’s expression shifts, turning predatory. I do it again, then again, not realizing, until my feet touch the carpet of his bedroom, that he was herding me.
I stop when the back of my legs touch the bed. Panting, I freeze, every muscle in my body trembling. Colt stops a few feet from me.
“I’ve been waiting a long fucking time for this, Evie. We did the tests. You’re on the pill. There is absolutely no reason I can’t have you tonight. I’ve imagined, a million times, how I was going to take you. All the things I was going to do to you. And I’m feeling really fucking greedy. So before I get inside you, you got anything you need to say? Any other shit in your head you need to get out?”
Any other shit in my head? So, so much. Bullshit from the restaurant, and those women judging my body. Past very unsatisfying sex with boyfriends. But no way am I going to let them exist in this room with us. But I know, until I do this one thing, I won’t be able to get out of my head and be totally present with him.
“Don’t move.” I order him, waiting for his nod. Taking a deep breath, I reach under my dress and pull down my tights, hurriedly stepping out of them.
His throat bobs as his eyes lock on my bare legs. “What…what’s happening? I have no objection, but something’s stewing in that beautiful head of yours.”
I shake my head, not wanting to discuss it. No more talking or I’ll lose my nerve. Instead, I pull my dress over my head in one quick motion, leaving me in one of my prettiest red lace bra and panty sets. They’re itchy, but it’s so worth it to see the way his eyes flare. I don’t let him look long, unhooking my bra and letting it drop soundlessly to the carpet. I don’t look at him as I shimmy my panties down, stepping out of them where they pooled at my feet.
When I’m completely exposed to his gaze, I move into the pool of moonlight near the windows, letting it illuminate my body. Letting him see my heavy breasts with the tiny silvery stretch marks. The roll I used to hate and my round tummy. My wide hips, decorated with more silvery lines and my strong, thick thighs.
“I want you to see me. All of me.” I say, focused on a point over his shoulder. “I don’t want to bring any of the crap in my head in here. I love me, but it’s not always easy to, and those women tonight got to me, as much as I wish they hadn’t. So I just need you to look.”
“Can I move now?” The words are nearly lost in the deep rumble of his voice. I nod my head, watching as his body, still fully clothed, moves into the beam of moonlight. I chance a look at his face. His gaze is roaming my body as he circles behind me. Those big hands turn me slightly.
“Look,” he murmurs.
