Her mouth drops open. “Are you seriously telling me you’d pick that guy over Colt?”
“Holly,” I say, leaning on the cart. “I’m not picking. Jeremiah asked. Colt didn’t.”
“But if he did? Would you do it? Date him?”
My stomach swirls. “I don’t know,” I admit. “I tried. I flirted and spent time with him, and he went to the fucking fights. It’s taken weeks for us to get back to normal. I don’t think our friendship could survive us dating.”
She steps back, shaking her head. “Maybe you and Colt aren’t supposed to be friends.”
“What?” I ask her, my heart sinking.
“Do you want him? Be honest. When you are around Colt, is it like hanging out with any of the other guys? Or is there an attraction that just won’t go away?”
I shift my weight, considering her words. “The last one,” I admit. “I’ve never felt for anyone what I feel for him.”
“Then why are you trying so hard to hang on to a shadow of what you could have? Take a fucking chance already!” She says, slamming her hands on her hips.
“I don’t want to lose him!” I whisper-yell, putting my own hands on my hips, mirroring her.
She rolls her eyes. “You’re being dumb. You don’t want to lose him? So what, you just date other people? Maybe go on double dates. He can bring his girlfriend to come pick you up. Oh, wait, no way would his girlfriend want him spending so much time with you. And Jeremiah? Things get serious with him, you know damn well you’re going to have to back away from Colt. I don’t care how emotionally secure a man is, Colt is intimidating.”
My mind is stuck on the idea of Colt with a girlfriend. Imagining his hands touching, holding a woman other than me, makes my stomach flip.
“Jesus.” I breathe, staring at her.
Her smile is smug. “I see it’s sinking in. You and Colt are not just friends. Could never be just friends. Seeing him in a relationship would kill you, Evie. We both know it.” Her eyes drift ahead, and a smile creases her face. “I mean, look at him. How can you not want to jump him?”
I follow her gaze, seeing the guys all clustered in the kids’ clothing department. They’re plowing through the racks, pulling out dresses and skirts and the cutest little t-shirts. I was so zoned in on my conversation with Holly that I somehow missed this sideshow.
There, in the middle of the chaos, is Colt. He has Mia snugged to his chest. His head is tipped, a smile on his face as she talks animatedly, her hand coming up to pat his cheek again and again. And it hits me so hard I have to turn away.
“We’re going to lose him, either way.” How could I have been so fucking blind?
“Yes.” Holly agrees. “He’ll never disappear from your lives completely, but this dance you’re doing isn’t sustainable. Something will change. It’s inevitable.” She pats my arm in sympathy. “It’s scary, I know. I can’t pretend to know exactly where you’re coming from…Micah told me exactly how he felt about me. But we still didn’t have an easy path. My own doubts, my insecurities, my lack of trust; all of it hurt him. But he laid it all out there, and it allowed us to move forward. I’m not trying to tell you what to do, I promise. But if you want him, I think you’re going to have to make that obvious to him.”
Make it obvious. Sure. Just walk up to him and tell him I want him desperately. That I have dirty dreams about him and I can’t just be his friend anymore. Not bloody likely.
“I don’t think I can do that. Besides,” I say defensively, “he’s not shy. If he wanted more, he would have said something.”
Holly’s smile is sad. “Maybe.” Micah’s call grabs her attention, and with another gentle pat on my arm, she moves to join him. He’s holding a tiny yellow onesie against his chest as he watches Holly walk toward him. He looks at her like she’s a movie star. Like the most incredible woman in the world.
When she reaches him, he folds over her, drawing her tightly to him, taking her mouth in the sweetest, hottest kiss I’ve ever seen in my life. The moment is so close, so intimate, that I look away, straight into Colt’s eyes.
He’s not smiling. His hooded eyes are locked on me, mouth pressed in a tight line. I tilt my head in confusion. Why is he looking at me like I crapped in his cereal bowl?
20
COLTON
My promise to never go to the fights again suddenly seems like a mistake. What the fuck am I supposed to do with all this pressure on my chest? Even Mia’s running commentary in my ear can’t distract me from Evie.
She has a date. She’s going on a date with another man, and I feel like something’s stuck in my throat. I can’t get a full breath. It’s that same fucker, the one who walked out with her last month. He’s always smiling at her. Of course, he asked her out, what man wouldn’t? She’s amazing. She lights up any room she’s in. It’s impossible for her to blend in.
Even now, standing in the aisle, I’m struggling to keep my eyes off of her. I want to look at her all the fucking time. Just being in the same room with her settles something in me I didn’t know was unsettled. That spiky ball of ache that usually lives in my gut moves into fluffy kitten territory when she’s around.
“What doing?” Mia asks, watching my brothers tear through the clothing in front of us. She’s squirmy, eager to get to the bikes.
“Why the fu-frick would they put this crap on little girls’ clothes?” Kade’s holding up a Mia-sized sparkly t-shirt printed with a kiss on it that saysHeartbreaker.
