I walk inside, the scent of incense curling through the air. The owner looks up, mouth open in shock, then breaks into a warm, crinkled smile.
“Dahlia-ji! I thought you had returned home.” Tenzig hurries over and presses his hands together with a slight bow. “Namaste.”
“Namaste,” I reply. With a sad smile, I add, “I did.”
“The mountains have called you back,” he says with a knowing look. “So, you must answer. You are tired. Come, I will show you to your room.”
I follow him gratefully, his kindness like a balm to my bruised and battered heart. I’m thrilled when he opens the door to the same room I’d stayed in before. The familiar walls feel more like home than the house I just fled.
“Come to the lounge when you are ready for tea,” he says gently as he leaves.
I unpack and sit on the bed, staring out at the water and woods beyond. Last time, I had searched only this side of the river. But something in those far-off trees calls to me, pulling at some deep, wordless place.
Tomorrow, I’ll ask Sita to guide me again, this time across the water. Although all I want to do is fall into this bed, I could really use a friendly face. So I bundle up and head back to the lounge for tea, hoping it will thaw the frozen hollow where my heart should be.
No matter how tightly I pull my coat, the wind sneaks icy tendrils under my hood and along the hem of my parka. The temperature seems colder than even when I left, leaving no doubt that winter is coming.
Inside once more, I stretch my hands toward the fire’s comforting glow. Tenzig sits beside me, passing me a steaming cup of chai.
After a long silence, I ask, “Tenzig, do you know if Sita is available to guide me again?”
“I believe so. She will be back in the morning, and you can ask her then.” His gaze softens. “You have come back for the plant?”
I nod, staring off into the fire. The memory of those eyes, glittering and watchful, presses against my skin again. Now that I’m back, I can feel them stronger than ever.
I should feel uneasy. Instead, I feel a slow-burning anticipation. The kind of shiver that caresses like a lover’s touch. A flicker of heat low in my belly. That gaze promised something wild. Something consuming.
The desire pooling within me is unexpected, but undeniable. I haven’t just been craving sex, but intimacy. A true connection. Space to explore my body, my wants, my limits. With Ben, things had been… fine. Slotted into rare moments between deadlines. But every time I tried to deepen it, he dismissed me.
So, eventually, I stopped trying.
And even when we did have sex, something was missing. Like we were both just going through the motions.
Now, I know why.
I deserve someone who’ll help me not only explore my sexuality, give me a safe space to experiment and uncover everything my body has to offer, but offer a genuine connection, a meeting of the heart and soul.
Not that I expect to find that here, high in the Himalayas.
Tenzig gently calls my name again, pulling me out of my thoughts and back to the present.
“Sorry, it’s been such a long day,” I murmur, hoping my longing doesn’t show on my face.
He only smiles and bids me goodnight.
I walk back to my room and barely make it under the quilt before I fall asleep.
Chapter
Five
Ihad every intention of waking early to find Sita. But my body, finally feeling safe, had other plans. When I stretch and roll over, the golden light of sunset pours through the window.
I hurry to the lounge to look for her, but Tenzig directs me to the fire pit outside. A new group of visitors huddles there, likely the last before the snow makes travel impossible. Sita moves among them, passing outsteaming cups of chai.
Kicking myself for wasting a whole day, I hover near the fire until she’s finished with her hostess duties. When she finally joins me, her warm smile reassures me.
I still apologize, “Sita, I’m so sorry I slept the day away!”
