“Alright, well, guess I’ll just go alone then.”
I peer up at him from behind my Kindle. He’s once more looking at me like that again. Sad. I’ve upset him. My chest constricts, and I find myself unable to breathe for a moment.
It’s all becoming too much.
How much longer can I do this? “Fine, but I have to shower first.”
His frown transforms into something brilliant, and he strides over to me, leaning down and pulling me into a filthy kiss.
My cock perks up even as the same feeling of dread bursts through my chest.
“See you soon. I’ll save you a seat.”
As soon as he disappears through the door, I set the Kindle down and pick up my phone.
I stare down at the slew of messages from my mom, my dad, and afew from Emily. The only good thing about her is that she seems just as disinterested in this entire arrangement as I am. She knows just as well as I do what we need to do to get what we’re owed.
I rub at my eyes and then switch my phone off, telling myself not to go to this stupid party, to stay home, to disappoint him. To show him the man I truly am.
But I can’t stand the thought of hurting him now when I know I’ll eventually do the unforgivable and lose him forever.
So, I’ll try for just a few more days until I’m forced to take action. Forced to pull away forever.
Or you could stay.
Those words are growing stronger each day, a chant inside my head. Dangerous, hopeful.
Almost too much to bear.
Sitting here thinking about that, letting those words chant inside my mind is making it hard to breathe. Perhaps being around other people will make it quiet down, so I move to the bathroom and shower, changing into a new set of clothes, before heading out. I’m about thirty minutes late, but hopefully by now the entire thing will be in full swing, and I’ll avoid having to speak to anyone for too long.
Only problem is, when I arrive, I see Caleb leaning into Magnus, the two of them smiling at each other.
I should let them have one another. They’d be perfect together.
He deserves better than you.
I know that, and yet I still cling to it. To him.
I watch them a little too long, my chest constricting until Magnus finally gets up and moves to grab food. It’s then that Caleb notices me from across the room.
His cheeks flush, and I see his pupils dilate.
I really don’t deserve him.
“Hey,” he says, spreading his legs out in front of him. He’s a fucking sight. “You’re late.”
I move toward him, unable to stop myself. “Why is it when I leave you alone with Magnus, I always end up finding you two touching?”
“He’s touchable,” he says with a grin. “Like a bunny or a hamster. He’s very tiny.”
I make a face, and Caleb smirks up at me, seeing the jealousy written clearly across my face.
“You were literally in his ass for over a year, and you don’t see me getting jealous when you spend time with him. Which is often, by the way, but heaven forbid he touches my knee.”
I narrow my eyes, and then Caleb sighs, pulling me onto his lap and pressing his lips to mine. I try to fight it, to show him how truly upset I am, but I can’t resist him for long. He’s a temptation I can’t deny.
I lean into him, my lips parting, my tongue delving into his mouth. He tastes like bubble gum, like something purely Caleb.
