I shook my head. I hadn’t heard a thing.
“He was the one that called the ambulance,” Ben explained. “He even rode in the back with you. Of course I accompanied him, but he wouldn’t leave your side. He was crying and apologizing over and over again. He didn’t stop.”
“He always apologizes.” I teared up and grabbed my stomach as if it were in pain—it was. An invisible knife was stabbing me. I closed my eyes and thought I could hear him promising, over and over again, that he would get help. I thought I remembered him holding my hand. Telling me he loved me. That he was sorry. That he wanted to be a better father.
JJ leaned in and put his hand on my shoulder. “He offered to turn himself over to the police, he was so distraught. Bruce arranged for him to go into rehab instead. We thought you would want it that way.”
I nodded and closed my eyes.
“Even though he’s a total asshole who I still hate, he does love you,” JJ added. “In some very fucked-up and strange way.”
There was so much to take in. In one night, everything had come to a loud angry head. The chaos that was my life had exploded, leaving behind a huge ugly mess. A mess that had splattered all over Ben. I wondered what he thought of me now. Would he really still want to date me—especially with a small daughter—if this was what my life was like? I didn’t know if I could be so accepting.
“Sera,” Ben whispered in my ear as he leaned in. “It’s all going to be okay.” He kissed me softly on the side of my face. “I’m here for you. We all are. It’s time you saw that.”
I felt a soft hand on my leg and heard the legs of a chair scrape across the floor. “I’m going to give you two love birds some time,” JJ said before leaning in and kissing my forehead.
I lay in silence for a while, listening to the sound of Ben breathing next to me. “I’m sorry,” I finally said.
“What are you sorry for?”
“Everything. How you’ve been dragged into this mess and—”
“Stop it. I told you, I want to be a part of your life. Even the bad bits.”
I managed a small smile.
“I’ve wanted to be a part of your life since the first time I saw you,” he added. “I love you.”
I closed my eyes when they started welling up with tears. “I love you too.”
With my eyes still closed, I felt him stroke my hand. “Sera White, hey?” he said.
I opened them again and looked at him, a smile plastered across his face.
“Whatever!” I quipped.
“We’ll see. We’ll see,” he said, coming up and softly kissing my forehead.
Epilogue
I sat on the lounger by the pool and looked out over the beautiful blue sea. I had that stuffed feeling from completely over-indulging over Christmas, but I’d also never felt more content in my entire life. So much has changed in a year and a half.
I’ve been doing a lot of hair braiding, finger painting and have been reading a lot of fairy tales lately—Li’s favorite is Cinderella, of course.
Bruce and JJ decided to retire and move to their holiday home in laid-back Cape Town a few months ago—JJ even decided to stop coloring his hair and embrace his grey. There were many tears, and long goodbye hugs, and dramatic soap-opera moments as if they were flying off to Timbuktu never to be seen again. (Cape Town is a short three-hour flight away.)
Ben and I are still “stuck” in the extended honeymoon phase of our relationship. I have a suspicion that it’s not going to wear off anytime soon. He tells me he wakes up every morning feeling like he won the Lotto—he always did know how to charm the pants off a girl.
Katie, too, is loving her well-deserved break from all the family chaos before she heads off to Med school, thanks to the JJ and Bruce scholarship fund. They insisted because, as JJ pointed out, they are both on the wrong side of sixty and will no doubt be needing medical care as they age gracefully—and dramatically.
But no one is having more fun than Li—who of course is completely stealing the show!
JJ decided that his little holiday project was to put on a show with Li, complete with outfits, solo numbers, choreography and the whole bang shoot! My favorite moment has to be when he dressed her as Marilyn, singing Happy Christmas—instead of birthday—to us all.
Bruce and JJ had left their apartment in Jo’burg to me. At first Ben thought he could DIY the merger of our two apartments by bashing a hole through the wall—they make it look so easy on the TV shows, don’t they?In the end, we contracted a team of professional builders and now we have one,hugeapartment.
Li has her own room—now painted “Frosted Tulip”, not pink. She’s been spending more and more time with us now that Ben officially has joint custody. Even Mei isn’t a major issue any more. She got over herself a bit when she realized the convenience of having so many other people willing to invest in her daughter’s life—a convenience she is not afraid to abuse—we don’t mind though.
