I’ve never been great at processing, and apparently, I’m still not. I’m sitting on this couch, openly staring at Connor, wondering what the hell would’ve happened to me if Connor Lang, my biggest role model, the first crush I ever had, and the reason I board the way I do, had been killed that night.
When he disappeared from the public eye, I was pissed, but that anger fueled me to keep pushing, go faster, carve harder, turn sharper. It gave me the edge I needed to win at all costs because I was hellbent on being better than him, breaking his records, and proving to myself that I could be the best. And Connor is the gold standard when it comes to boarding.
My sudden need to touch him is overwhelming. I need the physical contact as a reminder that he’s okay, but I’m very aware of our current company.
“Um, can I talk to you outside for a second?” I choke out, not really sure what my game plan is here.
Connor nods and excuses us.
I want to tread carefully. This new knowledge does somany things to me, including making me more aware of why he stepped away when he loved the sport, and increasing my understanding of why this coaching job is so important to him.
I don’t want to jeopardize that…but,fuck.
“Vox, I didn’t bring you here so you would pity me,” Connor says, placing his hands in his pants pockets, trying to keep them warm. It’s cold as hell out here, and neither of us put our jackets on before coming outside.
“I know, I just…” I trail off, totally at a loss for words, and when he turns to face me, I can’t stop myself from pulling him into my chest. He stiffens at first, but then relaxes and melts against me. I canfeelthe tension leave his body. My arms are around his neck and shoulders, and whenhisarms snake around my waist, it’s impossible to ignore how good he feels here.
His chest is heaving as much as my own, and when I feel his sob break free, I snap.
Turning my head to the side, I bury my face in his neck, my lips taking what they want. I didn’t mean to make contact at all, let alone make it sexual. I just wanted to let him know I’m here, and I’m not judging him or thinking any less of him. Instead, tasting his skin is making my brain hazy with lust, and all I can think is ‘how do I get more?’
Connor’s moan is accompanied by his hand flying to my ass, and I lose all sense of time and space and where the hell we are as I suck harder on the column of his neck before cupping his face with both hands, panting into his open, waiting mouth.
“Please,” is all he says before my tongue brushes across his lips, parting them easily. My favorite thing about kissing guys is that they tend to use more tongue than women…and when I kiss, I like it fuckingwet.Connor and I inhale each other, our tongues tangling in a sloppy, all-consuming mess. I’m plundering his mouth like it’s the treasure hold on a pirate ship, andhis tongue is fighting mine for dominance. He lets me claim victory as he moves to lick my bottom lip while I tongue-fuck his mouth even deeper. He moans again, causing my own grunt of desire to escape as he subtly grinds his hips into me with one hand still on my ass and the other on the back of my head. Still nipping and licking my lower lip, I move to do the same to his top one in a movie-perfect French kiss that’s made my toes go numb and has my balls ready to explode.
I’m about to lick a line from the hollow in his throat to the bottom of his chin and cover his neck in hickeys when the door opens.
I jump back so fast I almost knock Louisa to the ground.
“Oh shit! I’m so sorry!” I say, reaching out to steady her.
Through a quiet chuckle, she says, “I didn’t mean to interrupt. I just wanted to hand you these,” she says, holding our coats out for us. “I also wanted to invite you to stay for dinner and thought you could use the private moment to discuss.”
I’m not embarrassed about being caught kissing a man. Hell, I do that in front of crowds all the time…but it’s a little nerve-wracking to be caught climbing mycoachlike a tree on the front porch owned by a woman I just met.
“Thank you, Louisa,” Connor says, finding his voice first, though it’s strained. “We’ll be right in.”
She nods and closes the door without another word.
“I’m sorry,” I say immediately. “Guess everyone’s right; I’m not great at control.”
Connor gives me a sad smile. “You are when you want to be.”
“I really don’t want to be when I’m with you,” I confess, hooking my fingers in the pockets of his pants, pulling him toward me.
My fingertips graze the edge of his swollen cock, and his hips thrust forward as a harsh exhale leaves his lips.
“Vox.” My name is a plea on his lips, but whether it’s to stop or to keep going, I’m not sure. Either way, I don’t want to get him in trouble, and I don’t want to be the reason he suffers more than he already has.
So, I remove my hands.
“Are we staying for dinner?” I ask, changing the subject and letting him off the hook.
“It’s up to you.”
“I’m not ready to go back to my condo yet,” I admit.
“Then we’ll stay.”
