I need to feel him wrapped around me like that, claiming him in a way no one ever has before. To know that no matter what, that part of him will always belong to me.
And I want itnow.
“D?”
“Yeah?” he says, his voice raspy from not being used in the last hour and a half.
“I want to have sex. With you. Tonight.”
Chapter 31
Damon
Ifreeze on the spot.
It’s not like I haven’t thought about it. Hell, I think about it a lot, but as well as Liam has leaned into this, and as much as I’m learning to trust him to decide what’s right for him, that step is huge. Monumental, even. That will stay with us forever.
And goddamn, I want it.
But there is no going back after that. It isn’t a kiss or a hand job we might laugh about years down the road. To have him inside me is to change my life forever.
Before I can answer, Eloise knocks on the door. “Are you guys dressed?”
“Just a second,” Liam replies as he resumes getting into his clothes. The sleeves of my button-down are sticking to my greasy skin, and I’m having trouble getting it on. Liam walks to me, rips it off, and shoves his hoodie on over my head to hurry me along.
“You really need a fucking hoodie,” he says.
“Noted,” I grumble.
I give Rafael and Eloise their tips, and Liam and I make our way out to the lobby.
“D,” he starts as soon as we’re outside, “I really want to.” Taking my hand, he adds, “I don’t want anyone else to be your first. It should be me. Iwantit to be me.”
I swear to God, Liam is going to be the death of me. He’s like an addiction; you know it has the potential to kill you, but you can’t stay away, even for the sake of self-preservation.
“Not yet, Li. It’s too fucking fast.”
“For who? I’ve been having sex with girls I barely know since I was fifteen. I’ve knownyoumy whole life. This isn’t fast. Besides, if you were a girl, we would’ve hooked up already,” he points out, making it hard for me to argue with his logic.
We pass a small side street that houses the dumpsters for this part of the resort. It’s along the side of the spa building, and Liam pushes me down the little street and backs me against the exterior wall.
“If it’s too fast becauseyouaren’t ready, that’s one thing. I’ll respect that. But please, for the love of God, don’t hold out because you thinkI’mnot ready. I’ve never regarded sex as anything more than a release, a good time, or a way to blow off steam. But being here with you, exploring what this is, has made me see things differently. Because you aren’t just a temporary good time. I may not be your twin, but you’re ingrained in my DNA just the same. With every touch, I realize more and more that sex is, like, the ultimate physical outlet for love, and Iloveyou. I always have. And it’s only grown stronger since learning that not only do I love you as my best friend and brother, but I also love you, like, romantically and shit.”
I reach up to cup Liam’s face between my hands.
“That was the most beautiful speech I’ve ever heard, Li.”Even the ‘romantically and shit’ part. Hell,especiallythat part.
He plants his forehead against mine. “Does that mean you’ll do this with me?”
I sniffle because this fucker has made my tear ducts work overtime on this trip. I’ve never been this emotional in my life.
“Yeah, Li, I’ll do this with you.” I give in, because who could say no to those words coming from the only person they’ve ever loved with an all-consuming love like I have for Liam? Hell, if he wanted to flay me open just to watch me bleed, I’d probably let him.
His lips are on mine in an instant, and the way Liam holds me like I’m something precious, every time he kisses me, is not something I’ll ever get used to. He cradles my face and wraps an arm around my back like he’s the only thing keeping me upright.
Maybe he is.
“Let’s make a quick pit stop at the little market and pray they have lube and then take this back to the cabin,” he breathes against my lips.
