“Well, you switched our places in line, so you went first. As soon as you got to the other side, you pretended to get sick. You knew if you were hurt, I’d focus on getting to you and not look down. It worked, and I flew across that course in record time.”
Huh, I’d forgotten that part.
“When I reached you, you stood up, declared your emergency miraculously over, and hugged me. That’s when I knew for sure.”
Well, I’ll be damned.
“But we have a lifetime of those experiences,” I point out, needing to know more. “Why was that one so different from all the other shit we did for each other?”
“It was the first time it happened after I realized I’m attracted to guys.” Dropping his voice, he adds, “attracted toyou. I knew in that moment that as long as you were happy and safe, I could survive anything.”
Now that he’s stopped fighting me, I roll off him, but drape my thigh over both of his, wanting him to take comfort, as well as body heat, from me. He’s finally stopped shivering, so that’s a good sign.
“Say something,” he says when a few minutes have gone by without my reply.
“You could’ve told me sooner, but I’m kind of glad it didn’t happen until now.”
Damon turns his head to look at me when he asks, “Why?”
“I just feel like I needed to go through some shit before learning that. Not like I would’ve judged you or disowned you or anything,” I add hastily.But because maybe it’s not as weird as I would have believed, once upon a time.Perhaps I should, but I don’t say that last part out loud.
“Li?”
“Yeah?”
“Thanks for being here.”
“I told you, whatever it was, we were going to get through it together.”
As our conversation winds down, a thought slams into me. “When I heard you jerking off in the shower the other night, why did you say Julie’s name if you’re gay…and in love with me?”
Damon bristles.
“I didn’t,” he finally whispers in the dark.
“I could have sworn I heard you say?—”
“Li,” he says, cutting me off.“You heard me say Li and assumed it was the end of her name, but I was thinking of you. I’m always thinking of you. Is that weird?”
Maybe. Maybe not. I’m getting better at processing, but it’s too much for two-thirty in the morning. So, instead, I answer with, “Not to me. Now, can I trust you to stay in this bed and go to sleep, or am I going to wake up in an hour and find you standing on the roof, trying to catch hypothermia again?”
His soft, sleepy chuckle punches me in the chest as he rolls onto his side, out of my embrace.
“I’ll stay right here. I promise.”
Just to be sure, I throw my arm around his waist and drag him back against my body. His ass instantly connects with my crotch, but I pay it no mind. This is where Damon belongs.
“Hey, Li?”
“Mmhmm,” I hum.
“I don’t know if you know this about gay guys, but when they’re plastered against the body of the man they find sexier than anyone else in the world, it’s generally not conducive to sleeping.”
“Sexier than anyone else in the world, huh? Iknewyou thought I was hot.” I kiss the back of his head, elated that the burden of his secret has finally been lifted.
He laughs. “Oh, I think you’re hot, alright. But if you don’t let me put some space between our bodies, my dick is going to ensure I’m up all night.”
“Oh, uh, right.” Reluctantly, I pull my arm back and let him scoot forward, putting a couple of inches between us.
