“I asked him point blank on Friday. I shouldn’t have, but I knew that when it came to cutting roles, he would put mine at the forefront. And I was right.”
“Oh my god. Harper,” she says softly, coming over and wrapping her arms around me. “I’m so sorry. I can’t believe it!”
“I can,” I reply, my voice muffled in her shoulder. “Cosmo has been looking for an excuse to get rid of me since he took over the magazine. I should have known it was coming.”
She pulls back. “Do you know who else—”
“No, I’m sorry,” I say, biting my lip. “I don’t have a clue about anyone else. And I’m sorry to tell you this now; it’s not fair when we don’t know who else might go. It’s really selfish of me, actually.”
She shakes her head. “No, it’s not. I’m glad you told me now. And anyway, if it turns out that I’m losing my job next week, too, then at least we’ll be going together.”
“Right,” I say with a weak smile.
“Harper, you know this isn’t a reflection on you, right?” she checks, moving away to finish making the coffees. “It’s nothing to do with your work. It’s because Cosmo doesn’t get it! He doesn’t get his audience, he doesn’t get the magazine—he never bothered to try to understand why your features are so popularand how hard you work to get them. I know you don’t want to hear this right now, but honestly? I think you’re too good forNarrativemagazine under his leadership.”
“Thanks, Mimi. But it doesn’t matter. Obviously the publishers agreed with him.”
“Which baffles me!” she exclaims, grabbing a carton of milk from the otherwise empty fridge. “The powers that be care about numbers, right? Subscribers, newsstand sales, digital clicks—the majority of those come from the kind of popular features you head up!”
“Yes, but those features can also be done by Ryan Jansson.”
She carries the two mugs of coffee over to the sofa and I follow her, and we sink into the cushions next to each other. I take my mug gratefully, the comforting warmth heating my fingers as I clasp it in my hands.
“Ryan doesn’t have your contacts, and he doesn’t have your way with people,” Mimi points out. “Who else could have gotten Audrey Abbot on our front page but you?”
“Ryan is very good at what he does,” I reason. “He’ll be able to handle it. Cosmo knows that.”
Mimi shoots me a sympathetic look. “Ryan is going to be devastated. He won’t have seen this coming.”
I smile at the irony. “Oh, he saw it coming before anybody else.”
“What do you mean?” she asks, puzzled.
“Cosmo told him about the redundancies at the beginning of the week. I think he likes to see Ryan as his buddy. Anyway, we had a big fight about it yesterday.”
“You and Ryan?”
I nod, taking a sip of my coffee. “When he got back to the office. I confronted him about it and he admitted that he’d known for days.”
“About the redundancies or about your job specifically?”
“Both. Apparently Cosmo implied I was a goner. Ryan didn’t bother to tell me that, though. Instead, he just distanced himself from me so he wouldn’t have to lie to my face… making me feel likeIwas the one who had done something wrong. Pathetic,” I mumble.
“I don’t know, Harper,” she begins cautiously, “it sounds like Cosmo put him in a horrible position. I doubt he was allowed to tell you anything.”
“Of course not, but he still could have,” I argue. “He could have trusted me.”
“It’s not just that, though. I mean, if I were in his shoes, I’m not sure I would have been able to tell you. Breaking your heart like that, when everyone knows how much you love what you do?” She shudders. “It would be so horrible. It’s not really his place anyway—even if you are shagging behind the scenes.”
“I get that he was being professionally responsible,” I huff, irritated that she’s speaking sense. “But a warning would have been nice.”
“Would it have made any difference?” She tilts her head at me. “Honestly, Harper, if you want my opinion on this, you shouldn’t be focusing on who knew what when. You should be taking some time, looking after yourself, and when you’re ready, having a think about what you’re going to do next. We can look around for other jobs or you could consider going freelance. I bet there are loads of editors out there who would be desperate for you to write for them! There’s no harm in reaching out to your contacts.”
“And telling them that I’ve lost my job atNarrative? They’ll immediately doubt my abilities. I mean,Idoubt my abilities, so why wouldn’t they?”
“No, they won’t, Harper. Everyone knows what it’s like in this industry. Some of the best journalists in the country have had togo freelance.” She gives me a stern look. “You can’t let Cosmo make you believe you’re not valuable. I won’t have it.”
I smile at her. “If you get made redundant, I’d say you could hack it as a life coach.”
