I turn to stare at him. “How do you even know who Jamie is?”
“You’ve mentioned him a couple of times, love.”
“Have I?”
“When I phoned you after Niamh’s hen do… or sten, whatever it was. I believe you said that this Jamie person encouraged you into criminal activity?”
“Whoa.” Adrian’s eyes widen in excitement. “What kind of criminal activity? How come you’re telling Dad the juicy details and not me?”
“Okay, I don’t remember mentioning any of this to you, Dad,” I say, aghast. “I remember telling you about the traffic-cone theft—”
“You stole a traffic cone? That is lame,” Adrian scoffs.
“Yes, you said that Jamie encouraged it, and when you said it, his name rang a bell because I remembered that you gave him a lift to Isabelle’s wedding,” Dad rattles off. “He’s the one who works at Dancing Bear.”
What?I am clearly going mad. I must have mentioned these things to Dad in passing, but he’s managed to retain this level of detail?! He can’t remember where he left his car keys every time he needs them, butthishe recalls perfectly.
“Who is this Jamie?” Adrian demands to know.
“He’s a nice fella, from what I can tell,” Dad informs him, as I’m too bewildered by all this to speak. “Into his craft beer, has a beard, and he’s single.”
“Dad!”
He looks at me innocently. “What?”
“How do you know all this?! Have you beenstalkinghim?”
“What are you talking about?” He frowns. “You told me all this.”
“No, I didn’t!”
“Yes, you did.” He chuckles, before turning to face the phone screen. “She doesn’t even realize she’s talking about him.”
“A classic sign of subconscious desire,” Adrian declares.
“Oh my god!” I cry in horror. “I do not have subconscious desire for Jamie! And can you not say stuff like that in front of Dad!”
“What, stuff like you desire a bearded man?”
“Shut up, Adrian.”
“You told Dad he was single…”
“As a passing comment! It wasn’t a significant detail!”
“Sounds significant to me.”
“Okay, enough about this!” I dramatically instruct, my cheeks burning with embarrassment as Dad laughs with great amusement. “Time to move on!”
“I couldn’t have put it better myself. It is time to move on,” Adrian grins, holding up his mug of coffee as though to cheers. “And this Jamie chap seems like the perfect way to do so.”
I’ve discovered that when you suddenly find yourself single after living with someone for so long, what the other person contributed to the upkeep of the house becomes glaringly obvious.
For example, I’ve always been better at sorting bills because I like to pay and file them right away, while Matthew is the sort of person who tends to leave boring but important paperwork to “another time” (and a month later the bill is still sitting on the kitchen table, gathering dust). I’m also quite good at fixing things, like when the hot water is playing up, or the Wi-Fi isn’t connecting.
Matthew was, of course, great in the kitchen and also quite handy at stuff that you don’t consider very important until no one’s doing it, like getting items down from high shelves without needing to balance dangerously on a wobbly chair, or hanging pictures straight.
But you know what? I’m now seeing all my disadvantages coming to light as a good thing, because it is an opportunity for me to improve on what I’ve always considered my weaknesses.
