“He made a snap decision. He hasn’t thought this through. He’ll have some time away and then he’ll realize. And yes, I’m devastated that he ruined our wedding and humiliated me in front of… well… everyone. But, at the end of the day, we love each other. He knows that.”
Ruby and Leo share a look. I know what they’re thinking, but I also know I’m right. I’ve had all week to think about this. Matthew clearly panicked and broke up with me on a whim. We were together for all of our twenties, it’s normal that he’d worry that he’d somehow missed out. But I don’t believe that he doesn’t love me.
Why would he go to the trouble of giving me an engagement ring in the first place if he doesn’t? It’s not like I forced him to. That was all him.
“Freya,” Ruby starts again, clearing her throat, “would you even want him to come back after what he’s done to you?”
“I know it sounds mad,” I say with a shrug. “But, yeah. I can’t imagine my life without him. This week has been torture. I haven’t gone a day without speaking to him for twelve years. And now, it’s just cold turkey. It’s horrible.”
“Matthew broke up with you the day before your wedding,” Ruby emphasizes, as though I don’t know that. “He doesn’t deserve to ever speak to you again. He is a selfish, spineless—”
“I think what Ruby is trying to say,” Leo says, shooting her a look of warning, “is that you’ve been through a lot. A huge life change. And you should be focusing on looking after yourself right now, rather than waiting for him to come back. We all just want you to be okay.”
I shift slightly to face him. “‘We all’?”
“You have a good support network and everyone is here for you, whatever you need.”
I slide my head further down into the pillow glumly. “Everyone is gossiping about me, aren’t they? It’s mortifying. I haven’t been able to face replying to any messages. They’re all so pitying.”
“That’s not at all how it is,” Ruby says in her most serious tone. “Everyone thinks Matthew is the worst. No one is talking about you as if it’s gossip. It’s just… shit.”
“But it will get better,” Leo adds brightly. “You’ll get through this and be stronger for it.”
“Just like Britney and Kelly Clarkson and all the greats say,” Ruby adds solemnly.
I manage a smile. “You’re right. Anyway, enough chat about me. Let’s talk about you guys. How has your week been? And how are wedding plans?”
Leo looks horrified. “Freya, we arenottalking about our wedding plans.”
“Come on, Leo, it’s not like I can avoid weddings altogether. The season, remember? I have eight. Wait—” I hesitate. “Seven. It was eight including mine.”
“You don’t need to think about any of that stuff right now,” Ruby tells me gently.
“Fine, but eventually I’ll have to. Of course, the year that I get jilted at the altar is my busiest wedding year yet.” I let out a deep sigh. “Thatwasa good thing. It was supposed to be the best year of my life.”
“We’re here with you every step of the way,” Leo reminds me.
“Exactly,” Ruby says firmly. “We’ll work out a plan to help you get through the season in one piece. You leave that to us. And technically you weren’t jilted at the altar. So that’s something.”
“Yes, there is that, I guess. A broom cupboard is much more discreet. He didn’t give me the chance to get in the dress.”
Ruby winces, glancing up at where it’s still hanging on my wardrobe in its bag.
I know it sounds materialistic, but part of me can’t help thinking that one of the saddest things about the wedding going up in flames is that I didn’t get to wear the dress. The dress it took me seven bridal shops to find. An ivory crepe gown with a crisscross bodice and off-shoulder sweetheart neckline and a very gentle, sloping A-line skirt. It really is beautiful.
“Do you want me to hide it away somewhere?” Ruby offers.
“No, it’s fine. I’ll keep it here, just in case.”
“Well, let’s not think about stuff like that,” Ruby says abruptly. “Let’s watch trashy movies and eat loads of delicious food, and drink in the mornings. One day at a time, yeah?”
“Exactly,” I nod, gazing up at the dress bag. “One day at a time.”
Ruby reaches over, squeezes my hand, and then sits up straight. “Now, Leo and I prepared a little something to help cheer you up and remind you that everything is going to be okay.”
Leo groans, covering his face with his hands. “No, Rubes. You’re not actually going to make me do this.”
“Yes, Leo, I am,” she says through gritted teeth, jumping to her feet. “Because Freya needs some laughter.”
