And, somehow, because he's Keegan, he didn't even sound douchey when he said it.
The closest I've ever come to Hawaii is my unflagging love ofLilo and Stitch. I love Stitch's ability to make chaos wherever he goes, and I admire a woman willing to make voodoo dolls of her enemies. Not that I've ever made a voodoo doll. You know, just in case law enforcement ever asks.
Somehow, despite our differences, Keegan and I have been friends since college, when we roomed together. After college, we drifted apart. Although we both still lived in Austin, he and my then-boyfriend, Ollie, didn't get along. Neither of them ever said it out loud, but I could sense it. Ollie didn't like that Keegan was there first, even though my relationship with Keegan was never romantic, and Keegan didn't like ... well, I don't actually know what it was about Ollie that bugged Keegan.
During the years Ollie and I dated and then lived together, Keegan and I hung out less, despite my best efforts. But the second Keegan heard that Ollie and I had broken up and I was kicking him out, Keegan showed up at my place with a rental truck, a dolly, and a half dozen mutual friends to help pack up Ollie's stuff and get him out of my life.
I am not exactly comfortable letting other people do favors for me. I don't think I could have accepted that help from anyone but Keegan.
He's offered to help me out a lot over the years. Everything from trying to coax me into trips to Hawaii to subtly stocking the fridge with my favorite foods.
I have always refused the trips (no matter how tempting, exotic, or needed), and as soon as I caught on to his shopping shenanigans, I started labeling all my food as soon as it came into the house.
What can I say? According to my mother, I have stubbornness issues. But I prefer the phrase “obstinate, headstrong girl,” because Jane Austen always says it best. But I digress.
My point is, the breakup with Ollie is the only time in our friendship that I let Keegan help me. Sure, it's nice that he wants to give me charity. I just refuse to be the person who receives charity. Do you blame me?
Keegan needs someone in his life who doesn't want things from him. It might as well be me.
Now that Ollie is out of the picture, Keegan seems perfectly content hanging out at my place, eating takeout, and watching sci-fi. Tonight, it'sGalaxy Quest—probably the best movie of all time. We've got a cheap AF box of red wine and take out from Ramen Tatsu-Ya.
In short, it's the perfect Saturday evening.
Or it would be if I had even a hint of an idea for how to sell this damn steam vac.
I give another dramatic sigh, rolling over to my belly, propping myself up on my elbows to glare at the vacuum again.
Keegan groans, and I can practically hear his eye roll.
I'm about to just give up and kick the damn thing to the curb, but before I can stand, Keegan lowers himself to the floor, mirroring my posture.
“Okay, Glasses. Lay it on me. What's bugging you about this one?”
I shift, rolling onto my side to look at my best friend. “Y-you don't have to do this.”
“Nonsense.” Once again he mirrors my posture, one elbow wedged under him, knees crooked as he faces me so that our legs almost touch. “We're in this together. If you're in a deathmatch with a vacuum, then so am I.”
I kick my foot out to nudge his shin. “But you hate being on the floor.”
“I work at a bar.”
Keegan is underselling himself. He doesn'tworkat a bar. Heownsa bar. And Hung Out to Dry is one of the most popular bars near campus.
I nudge his shin again. “Your point? Because I don't follow.”
“The floors at the bar are caked with fifty years of spilled beer and vomit. If I burned the bar to the ground, I wouldn't want to sit on the pile of ash left behind.”
“I thought there were health codes and vats of bleach involved?”
“I'm just saying, there's a reason I don't get down on the floor at the bar. I'm not afraid of getting hepatitis on your floor.”
“Good point.”
“Okay, break it down for me. You can write copy about anything. Why does this one have you stumped?”
So, so, so many reasons.
If I can nail this ad, I'm hoping to parlay it into a promotion. One in which I head up my own team and (hopefully) make more money. Money that will keep me from having to find a roommate. Ollie never contributed a lot of rent, since his income was less stable than mine, but money has been tight now that I'm footing the entire bill. Of course, I can't say that to Keegan, because he'll just offer to loan me money.
