Rowan produces a bag loaded with a dozen different pastries. He’s got a big thermos of coffee, too, so Dex and I enjoy a virtual feast as Rowan starts the engine and guides us out of the harbor.
“Who d’you have covering the shop today?” Dex asks around a mouthful of apple strudel.
“Just a new guy I’ve hired. I’m trialing longer opening hours at the moment, and it’s too big a day for me to work by myself when I’ve already been up early for the baking shift.”
“Good for you,” Dex says.
“Did you want us to save anything for you before we devour it all?” I ask Rowan, because we’re dangerously close to demolishing the breakfast.
Rowan laughs. “No, I ate on the walk over. You can’t beat croissants fresh out of the oven.”
Soon we’re past the harbor, and I can’t focus on anything except the view. As soon as we leave Copper Creek behind, the dark forest swallows the coast, with snow-dappled mountains looming behind.
By the time we reach the Copper River Delta and turn inland again, I haven’t seen any sign of civilization in a while. I saw the delta on my flight into Copper Creek—a sprawling expanse of vivid green cut through by a network of meandering rivers. From the water, I can only see the banks of the river we start jetting up, but the mountains remain a constant presence, rising steep-walled in a line where the flat basin ends.
As we skim our way deeper into the delta, Dex comes around to sit beside me so he doesn’t have to look out the window backward. Which is once again unnecessary, since the seat I’m on is cramped with the two of us and there are plenty of others to choose from.
I decide to believe he’s doing it just so he can be close to me. As a bit of a test, I leave one hand resting on my leg close to his, wondering if he’ll try to hold it. He doesn’t, but he puts his own hand on his own leg close enough that our knuckles brush together. And I swear he reaches out one finger and grazes the back of my hand.
Fuck, I wish he would just hold my hand. I refuse to do it myself, but if he does, I’m not going to object.
To my disappointment, there is no handholding on the boat ride.
It feels like several hours have passed before Rowan backs the boat onto a riverbank and we climb out onto a stretch of sandy ground.
“Have you been fly fishing before?” Rowan asks me as he offloads supplies.
“Yeah,” I say. It was years ago, when I was about ten years old, but I won’t mention that bit.
“There are pretty strict rules around fishing here,” Rowan says. “I’ll need to identify anything we catch before we decide if we can keep it, and we’ll stick with one fish each. There’s a restaurant in town that will cook them up for us tonight once we’re back.”
“That’s a fucking good idea,” Dex says, while my stomach twists at the thought of spending money on something as frivolous as eating out.
Rowan gets us set up with waders and rods, and I watch out of the corner of my eye to see how far they’re casting out and whether they use any special technique. Soon I’m casting without thinking about it, mostly soaking in the serene majesty of this very special place. As the day goes on, I find myself dreaming about longer trips into the delta—apparently there’s a massive glacier at the top, and there are hiking trails all around the region. I wonder if you can raft any of the rivers here. That would be incredible.
It isn’t until we stop for lunch that I realize it’s the first time in almost a year that I’ve dreamed of the future with even a scrap of excitement. Until now, I’ve just been surviving. Living day by day, trying my best not to backslide.
It seems Copper Creek is exactly the right place for me.
Chapter 28
Dex
It isn’t long before I catch a salmon, and Rowan hauls in a trout shortly after me. Korren isn’t catching anything, but he doesn’t seem to care. There’s a spark in his eyes that I’ve never seen before, and I’m secretly gleeful because I know it means he’s falling in love with this place just as I’d hoped.
“You doing all right, Dex?” Rowan asks me as we prepare sandwiches for lunch. Korren is still knee-deep in the river, gaze fixed on the wall of mountains rising from where the delta ends.
“What d’you mean?”
“I know your parents cut you off. It’s not exactly a secret around town. Was it—?” And he tilts his head toward Korren as if asking whether my dad disowned me because I was into guys.
“I’m not gay, asshole! It was something really fucking dumb that I did, and I don’t want to talk about it.”
A shadow passes over Rowan’s face. “I wasn’t—I mean—”
I pause and look up from the sloppy ham and cheese sandwich I’m assembling. He looks like he’s wrestling with something, and I have no idea what’s going on.
“Can you keep this quiet? I haven’t told anyone yet.”
