My heart deflated. To be honest, I’d never wanted to have kids. Bella showing up on my door had been unexpected and the best thing that ever happened to me, but it hadn’t made me want to have more.
But hearing that Skye didn’t want any more made me…sad.
“It’s not that I didn’t want to have more kids, I just didn’t want to have them as a single parent.”
A spark of hope lit in my chest. “So you do want more kids?”
“When I was younger, I was sure that I was going to have three. But not the way I had Callie. I thought I would get married first and then have kids. It didn’t turn out that way. Which is fine, great actually. Having Callie is the best thing in my life, but…once I had her and made the decision not to date then that sort of made getting married and having more kids impossible.”
“Why did you decide not to date?” She’d said that it was because she wanted to focus on being a mom, but after meeting her mom, I had a feeling there was more to it than that. “Did it have anything to do with your childhood and Lola?”
She turned toward me, and I could see that my observation, or guess, surprised her.
“I talk to people for a living, remember?” I answered her unspoken question.
“Right.” She smiled and it warmed me from the inside out. “Yeah, my mom had me when she was young, only sixteen. She was with my dad, and from the pictures I’ve seen it looked like they were a happy family, but then he died when I was two. After that, she dated. A lot. I just never wanted Callie to live with a revolving door of men coming in and out of her life.”
“You said Callie’s dad is out of the picture. Has he always been or…” I knew that it was none of my business, but I couldn’t help but ask. Maddox hadn’t been able to find any information on him, which was frustrating as hell.
She was quiet for a few moments as she stared out over the waves. Then she took a breath. “He was my college professor. He taught Ethics in Medicine, which I see the irony in now. But at the time, I was just enamored by him. He was smart, funny, attractive, and really, I don’t know, charismatic.”
I rolled my shoulders as an uncomfortable surge of jealousy shot through me. Listening to her talk about another man was not easy, and I had no one to blame for it but myself. I’d been the one to ask her about Callie’s father.
“We started…seeing each other when I was eighteen and he was thirty-four.” She let out a forced laugh. “I’m that age now and the thought of dating a teenager is…” She shook her head. “I mean, I was only a few years older than Callie.”
The jealousy I felt a moment before was replaced with anger at the thought of Skye being taken advantage of, which is exactly what it had been. He was basically twice her age, a grown man, and she was barely legal.
She sighed. “Anyway, we were together for about ten months and then I found out I was pregnant. When I told him, he totally changed. Seriously, like Jekyll and Hyde. He went from being this funny, charming, kind, attentive boyfriend to being a total asshole. He told me to get rid of it and then completely shut me out of his life. I was so confused. I was heartbroken until I found out he was married. He had a wife and three kids the whole time I knew nothing about.
“So yeah, he’s not in the picture and never has been. And he was probably another reason I decided not to date. Tim was my first boyfriend, and so yeah, that and the men I’d seen come in and out of my life sort of soured me on the whole idea of love. I didn’t want to waste my time or hurt Callie, so I just put all my focus into raising her and building some semblance of security.”
I stared in awe at a woman who had not taken the easy way out in life. She could have gotten into a relationship and been with any man she wanted. But she’d put her daughter first. She’d denied herself companionship and I admired and respected the hell out of that.
“You are amazing, do you know that?”
“No, I’m not.” She shook her head.
I’d noticed that she didn’t take compliments well, the few that I’d given her she’d rebuffed or been dismissive of. It bothered me that she didn’t know just how fucking incredible she was.
“I wish you could see yourself the way I see you.”
She looked away from me and took in a shaky breath. “I think it’s probably time to get your mom, er, Naomi back.”
Fuck.I’d pinky promised that there would be no funny business and the first talk we’d had together I’d told her that I wished she could see herself the way I saw her.
“Yeah.” I nodded as my heart pounded hard in my chest.
Skye popped up and she brushed the sand off her ass. I did my best not to look but the jeans she wore molded to her generous curves.
I started to stand when I noticed that I was rocking a half chub. I hadn’t popped an inappropriate boner since I was in middle school. Having it happen now, when I was turning forty in a couple weeks was downright embarrassing.
This was going to be a long summer.
