It felt like falling.Images of her childhood went past me—the loneliness she felt, the bright joy she felt in the Faerie Village, and then there was another scene. It included her talking to some shadow in her room, and I knew it must be my brother. Angels were able to cast a glow of themselves through different dimensions, but it cost a lot of energy.
I used this memory of them both and dived deeper, until a strange feeling arose in my chest. Suddenly I was being pulled into a hidden place, an underground river, where the air smelled thick and metallic. It was dark, but I was able to catch a glimpse of white hair.
I reached out blindly in her dreamscape, and suddenly the ground shifted under my feet, pulling me down. The water started to disappear around me.
I wasn’t in Gwendolyn’s memories anymore.
I wasinsidewhatever hidden place her soul had sensed.
The realization hit me like a lightning strike.
Malakai had been trapped here the entire time. Alive. Somewhere below the Ancient Springs. And he was calling out to her through her bond, through her dreams, begging for help.
And now, we were here.
I looked over at Gwendolyn, realizing I took her right with me. Into the depths of whatever portal, I had just opened.
Chapter 23
Fourteen years. Six months. Thirteen days.
That’s how long it had been since I last saw daylight.
I was screaming inside, yet not a single word slipped past my lips. It was like I tried speaking a thousand words and all that came out of my mouth was silence. I wanted to pull at my clothes before realizing I was bare.
“Malakai, with an angelic body like yours it would be a shame to cover it up.” Her words still lingered in my ears—ears I yearned to cut off to never again hear the sounds of her whip against my skin.
The chains around my hands cut deep into my skin, the metal preventing me from healing myself.
I didn’t know who I was anymore, I didn’t even carry any dark thoughts, I was just empty.
I thought of her, of her touches, of everything she took away from me. I wanted to hate her. But I didn’t even carry enough strength to express hate. She’d abducted me, tortured me, made me do unspeakable things. Things I couldn’t even name, as our language hadn’t yet invented words for such cruelty.
It was like my soul was a prisoner in my own, failing body. Abody I was starting to get disgusted by, because it was only ever supposed to be given to my mate.
To Gwendolyn.
But no one could hear me. I was still here, begging for her to find me. She was the only reason I still tried gasping for air, although my lungs had stopped breathing a long time ago. Without the hope of finding her, caressing her skin, making her mine, I knew my body would stop fighting for good. So, I needed to keep going, even if it was nearly hopeless. No one would be able to find me here.
“Where are you smelling him?” I heard a voice, almost a whisper, but I couldn’t form any words.
Who was talking to me? Was that my brother’s voice?
“What are you feeling?”he spoke again.
They’d found each other. A tear dropped down my face, realizing she was with him, and Xavier probably.Safe.
I looked up, imagining her. Gwendolyn. It wasn’t the first time I perceived her as an illusion in my cage, a beautiful, haunting, mesmerizing one. The side-effect of being so lonely.
Sometimes, when the days had been very bad and Leanan tortured me for several hours, I imagined the day I’d meet her. Inwardly, I was aware it could only remain a wish. I would never expect that anyone would want a broken angel as a mate. I also would not even want her to, too afraid my trauma might darken any parts of her untainted soul.
My mother left us when we were little, she taught me the courage of the stars and moons and how beautiful it was to just exist. I always thought she meant the sky, but now looking at my mate and her strength, I knew she was talking about her. She was made of the moon and stars, ethereal and radiant. Her existence was the only guidance, inspiration and hope for me, her life provided a sense of comfort and reassurance in the lingering darkness I felt.
Gwendolyn was my solace, and even if I only saw her through my mental capabilities, it was enough to keep me going. As soon as she was born in the human world, I came back to my senses. The knowledge that the other half of me was still alive strengthened my resolve.
Somewhere in another life, I would be able to love her.
With every day stuck here, I started to miss her more and more, the feeling becoming unbearable. Sometimes I was afraid that it would break me. And even if I would die here, never meeting her in my physical form, I would always be grateful that the universe chose her for me.
