Christ, I shouldn’t be thinking about windows of opportunity. I made up my mind. I’m respecting her original no-hanky-panky decision and that’s that. She’s just having a moment of weakness brought on by my glasses or her bad days or something.
As I slip into bed, I find myself very upset with the person I was an hour ago. A beautiful, sexy, smart, funny woman offers you a ticket to their ride, you should always take the ride. I mean probably, anyway. It sure seems like a good idea in hindsight.
In the quiet of my room, I hear a faint noise coming from the direction of Lyric’s room. I raise up in my bed, craning my neck to listen for it again.
Is that… Are those sexy noises? The unmistakable melody of a moan fills the air. Yes, those are definitely sexy noises. Oh, Christ. I cup my hands over my ears. Hearing one too many of those will certainly weaken my regard. But now they’re just muffled sexy noises.
I lie back, slamming the pillow over my face. I tuck the sides around my ears, pressing it hard against my ears like somehow that would help. Does she not realize how loud she’s being? God, she sounds hot as fuck. How am I supposed to fall asleep like this?
Tater’s head burrows between my left side and the blanket, curling himself into a tight little donut. He’s seemingly unaffected by the moans, as proven by the fact that he literally fell asleep as soon as he closed his eyes.
This is my punishment, isn’t it? You turn down an advance from a beautiful woman for technically the second time and the price you pay is aural torture. Not to be mistaken with oral torture. And that’s how I know I’ll make a great dad someday. I’ve got the joke part down.
Great, now my dick is getting hard. It’s going to be a long night.
CHAPTER 9
LYRIC
“What the hellis this guy’s problem? I mean, what the hell is his actual problem?” I pull my makeup brushes from their sleeves, lining them up on my tray as I speak. “I mean, we kiss. He rejects me and we don’t speak. It occurs to me that maybe he was under the impression that I wanted a commitment. Which I didn’t.”
I swirl my brush into the light pink blush, tap it against the tray, and begin applying it to Mrs. Barbedian. Her sons will be here to see her in an hour, and she still needs a little work. “So I offer myself to him and he does it again. Rejection. Twice. By the same guy. Now, I’m into a lot of weird stuff, Mrs. Barbedian, but rejection isn’t one of them.”
There’s something about the slight hook of a smile on the right side of her mouth that makes me think she knows exactly what I mean.
“To make matters worse, I just know I’ve accidentally made it awkward between us. I don’t know that for sure, but you don’tget to come back scot-free from an offer of sex.” I sigh, brushing along her cheekbone up to her temple. She has delicate features, and I don’t want to overdo it. In all the photos they gave me for reference, her makeup is modest. And my goal more than anything else is to make her as she was to her loved ones.
“So, I mean, I guess I should take the hint at this point. He’s clearly not attracted to me and that’s that.” I blush the end of her nose and then lay my brush down. “You’re right,” I tell her. “I probably should talk to someone who can talk back.”
I pull my gloves off and reach into my pocket for my phone.
ME
I propositioned Waylon for sex last night and he rejected me again.
I don’t have to wait long for Darcy’s reply.
DARCY
Oh my god.
ME
Yeah, so I’m done with that. My ego can’t take it.
DARCY
Didn’t you tell me that you told him no hanky-panky when you moved in? I remember because you used the phrase “hanky-panky” and I rolled my eyes.
ME
Well, I had a momentary lapse in judgment fueled by how damn sexy he looks all the time. Do you know he wears glasses?
DARCY
Hedoes? I’ve literally never seen them.
ME
