“I just don’t want to lose you. You are my best friend.”
Truth is, he already did. Bit by bit—the dropped phone calls, the forgotten hand signals…
Maybe before I could justify how things were, but now?
Too much has happened for me to be okay with it. We have a moment of silence where he is pacing and I am clutching an ice pack. The only thing between us is air.
Until he breaks it with, “You must have plans today. You look nice.” He darts his eyes from the tray to the calendar hanging on my fridge.
“Yeah, I have an event. I was going to finish getting ready after I was done baking…”
“With Holden?”
I nod at the gray, stained carpet I am now standing on. The pain is not stopping in my hand.
We could stand here for hours while I explain every moment that upsets me, but I don’t have the energy.
In less than an hour, I have to get ready to meet Holden. I just can’t do this again.
“Guess that’s it then? No chance of winning you back?” His eyes soften as he takes another step forward, toward me. I shake my head no.
I whisper, “Just because we weren’t right for each other right now doesn’t mean that was always the case.” I move closer, feeling his breaths against my skin.
“I know. Just not anymore,” he murmurs, leaning in for one kiss. My body swivels away from him and his lips land on my cheek.
The tears don’t come until he slips out the door.
Saying goodbye for the last time.
Chapter twenty-eight
Dressing Up Lies
It takes me a few minutes to control my breathing before I can properly stand up straight. My legs are wobbling like Jell-O, and my mind is completely frayed—twenty minutes behind schedule.
There are five unread text messages in the span of forty-five minutes blowing up my phone. The background actor and Lena are questioning me all at once.
To make matters worse, I have pit stains underneath my shirt from running down five flights of stairs. The nonstop buzzing in my pocket sends me flying faster out the door and onto the street, reading each one as I wait for my ride:
Lena:Charlotte, the press coverage is threatening to charge us even if you don’t show up.
Lena:Get your ass here now.
Lena:They are saying they will stay another thirty minutes or they are out.
An electric panic runs through me, acutely aware that I am about to be in front of cameras soon.
Pulling out the compact mirror wedged inside my purse, I take a second look at myself as I wait for the rideshare to pull up. My face is still covered in black-stained tears from the hour before.
Licking the palm of my palm, I frantically scrub the side of my face, desperate to remove it as the car pulls up. The gust of wind hits me all at once as I open the door to the back seat.
“Duas almas incompletas.”
A chant I’ve heard time and time again—it makes me uneasy knowing it almost always happens right before Holden is around me.
My pendant glows before her voice comes through.
“Call him, Charlotte. He is wondering where you are.”
