“There,” she encouraged. “Now tell me what you want.”
“I want the stupid guy. But I’ve made a choice that will fuck up his career if he’s with me and I won’t let him do that for me.”
“Shouldn’t that be his decision?”
“I don’t know. I don’t want to live like he does, always under the microscope and surrounded by criticism. I don’t want to be told whether or not I should be working at the dungeon. I don’t want to be referred to as ‘Alex Chase’s girlfriend’ for the rest of my life regardless of my own accomplishments. I don’t want to be the pathetic sex worker who fell for her client. This isn’tPretty Womanand I don’t need anyone to save me.”
“That was a whole lot of what you don’t want. Whatdoyou want?”
I opened my mouth to babble some more, but she cut me off. “Don’t answer that yet. Go back to Ophelia’s. Turn your phone off. Take a bath. Think about it. I’m cancelling your clients for the next week at the very least. Beyond that, you can let me know.”
“Thank you.” She was making it sound like no big deal even though it would be a nightmare for her to deal with.
“It’s fine,” she said dismissively. “I’m going to let the girls back in.”
Ophelia was booked for the rest of the afternoon, so I called a ride to take me back to her place. I did as Victoria advised and sunk into a steaming hot bath, thoughts churning, but no longer threatening to overwhelm me.
I didn’t have to have the answers right now. As she’d reminded me, I was still Lady Elena whether I worked at The Key Club or not, and since I had the money from my contract with Alex, I didn’t need to go rushing into anything else. I could focus on getting through the backlash from Max and figure the rest out later.
As I went to bed that night, I was so exhausted and emotionally strung out, I was barely functional. I turned my phone off and buried it in my bag, planning to avoid the initial onslaught that would come with my story being published. The only people who mattered knew where to find me.
46
Alex
It had been almost two days since I screwed it all up, and I still woke up reaching for her. My fingers grasped nothing but cool sheets.
I checked my phone, still hoping to find she’d answered me, but there was nothing from her. My phone had been blowing up, though. Everyone from Asha to my mom had been calling and texting.
I clicked on a link in a message from Asha and it felt like the world dropped out from under me. It took me to aHollywood Weeklypiece written by Elena in which she detailed a horrific experience with Max when he’d been her client at the dungeon.
She hadn’t sensationalized it in her writing, and yet it was horrendous to read what she’d gone through. And I didn’t doubt for a second she’d really gone through this. It made too much sense, why she wouldn’t have told me about him, the way she shut down around him. I was the worst kind of asshole and would never forgive myself for the things I’d said to her that night when this is what she’d been dealing with. How had I not noticed?
She might not forgive me, but I still had to find a way to support her. She’d gone marching into this by herself and I couldn’t let her bear the brunt of it alone.
I texted my team to come over immediately so we could work through a strategy, then felt like I was going out of my mind waiting for them to get there. I swung from the height of toxic masculinity—fighting the urge to drive to Max’s house and beat him senseless, taking Elena his front teeth as an apology offering—to gut-wrenching heartbreak, replaying those conversations with Elena when she’d talked about how a scary incident at work was the least of her worries when it came to men. She’d always referenced one particular bad client. Now that he had a face, it was far too real. And not just any face, the face of a man I’d enjoyed working with. Was I on set with him the next day, cracking jokes while Elena fought for the bravery to go back to work and trust her clients again?
I was still shaking with anger by the time Asha, Chad, and Rami arrived, but needed to focus on what we could do to help her.
“How do we handle this?” I was hoping these strategic minds could see a clearer path forward than I could.
Chad paced at the window, then turned back to me slowly. “This is going to be an unpopular opinion, but hear me out…I’ve talked to crisis management and I’ve talked to Max. We don’t really know what happened between them. There are two sides to every story. Max doesn’t deny he was a client, but says she agreed to or instigated everything between them and is now just trying to drum up press by making herself a victim. Point is, he’s got friends in high places and you’re not gonna do yourself any favors taking sides on this. We issue the breakup statement as planned, don’t comment on this controversy, and let this whole thing blow over without getting dragged into it.”
I stared at him, unsure how I couldn’t have seen him for what he truly was before. We’d been working together for almost ten years. In some ways, I had him to thank for my success. Maybe I’d been blind to his faults this long because I felt like I owed him something.
“You’re fired,” I said simply, turning to the others. “If either of you feel the same way, there’s the door.”
Asha glanced at the door and went straight back to her computer. Rami walked across the room, and for a second I actually thought he was leaving, but all he did was hold the door open and look at Chad expectantly.
Chad sputtered and tried to argue, backpedaling to say, “Whoa, calm down, man. If you want to handle it another way, that’s fine. I’m just doing my job and looking out for your career.”
“Some things matter more than my career. Issuing that statement today and not commenting would be as good as announcing we’re breaking up because I don’t believe her.”
“Do youbelieve her?” Chad’s incredulous expression made it clear where he stood on the issue.
From where he still stood holding the door open, Rami said, “Bro. He fired you. Get the fuck out.”
Chad stormed across the room and retrieved his leather satchel. “You’re gonna throw a decade of partnership away over this? I made you. No one who matters will touch you after this.”
