He flipped her sandwich onto a plate and set it in front of her.
It smelled mouthwatering, but Chelsea was distracted by what he had just said — and by the way he was looking into her eyes. “We haven’t had any real conversations about what it’s going to look like,” she said softly. “Parenting together, I mean. How much time is the baby going to spend with you, and how much with me? What are we going to do when there are important decisions that need to be made? Do we have the authority to decide things without each other? Are we going to stay in constant contact?”
She shook her head. “I know you can’t answer any of that right now. I wouldn’t expect you to. But these things are running through my mind nonstop, Miles. In some ways, it would almost be easier to be on my own — even though that isn’t what I want — because I would be able to start making plans. You know? I would know what the future was going to look like, and I could start to get ready for it.”
He nodded. “We’re going to figure all that out,” he said. “But I can promise you this: whatever decisions we make about the way we want to raise our kid, we’ll make them together. You won’t be waiting around to find out what I want to do. What you want matters to me too. I hope you know that.” He sat back down at the table and looked into her eyes.
It was just like it had been on top of the Ferris wheel — the two of them were overwhelmingly, shockingly close. But this time, Miles had just promised to be a presence in her life forever. He’d promised that he would be by her side no matter what, and that the two of them would decide everything together.
It was so much more than Chelsea could have hoped for. The moment swept through her like a tidal wave. The fluttering in her stomach was now so intense that she could hardly draw breath. A single word came into her mind —maybe.
And there were his lips, so surprisingly full and soft for such a hard man. It was all she could do to hold back…
He isn’t holding back.
He was leaning closer to her. She felt the intensity between them like the crackle of electricity. His eyes were drifting closed.
Oh, my God.
She could barely breathe. He was actually going to kiss her. He was going to cross the line she had told herself they couldn’t cross. What was he thinking?
He isn’t thinking. That’s the only explanation.
And Chelsea decided she wouldn’t think either. Come what may, she would allow this to happen.
She closed her eyes.
Waited.
Nothing happened.
She opened her eyes again. Miles was sitting back in his chair, looking down at his hands. He had pulled away from her.
He shook his head as if he was trying to clear it. “We can’t… we… this wasn’t part of the arrangement, Chelsea.”
“I know,” she said quickly, her face heating up. Did he think she’d been trying to start it? She thought it had just sort of happened. “I didn’t mean… I wasn’t trying to…”
He got to his feet. “I should get to bed,” he told her. “I’ve got a big day tomorrow.” Before she could respond — before she could say a word — he had retreated from the kitchen, leaving her on her own. Chelsea looked down at her untouched sandwich. She had gotten out of bed hoping to settle her thoughts… but Miles had just left them in more disarray than ever.
CHAPTER 15
MILES
“How are we doing?” Dr. Montgomery asked.
Miles and Chelsea murmured in response. Miles wondered whether Chelsea felt as awkward as he did about the two of them attending this doctor’s appointment together after the almost-incident in the kitchen the night before. All he could think about was that whiff of cinnamon and vanilla he’d gotten when he had leaned in close, and how much he had longed for her kiss — before common sense had reared its ugly head.
I did the right thing by stopping.
Yes, he had. He knew that. They couldn’t afford to let things get complicated. But there was no denying anymore that things werealreadycomplicated, if they had come that close to kissing. Even now, the room crackled with tension.
Maybe I shouldn’t have come with her.
But he couldn’t set aside what had happened before the kiss. That conversation had been good. Important. He had promised her that he was going to be there for her. He couldn’t take thatback now. He had to follow through. And besides, he wanted to be here. He wanted to be involved in all these little moments.
“Lie back, and try to relax,” Dr. Montgomery instructed Chelsea. “Let’s see what we can see.”
She lay down on the examining table. While the doctor got set up, Miles puzzled for a few moments over where he ought to be, then went to stand by Chelsea’s shoulder, hoping that he would be out of the way.
