Right?
Suddenly, without warning, a memory sprang to life in his mind. It had been Christmas Eve. Miles was ten years old, waiting for his father to come home so that the two of them could decorate the tree together. He’d been hoping for weeks that his father would make time for the two of them to do this together, but this was the night it would finallyhaveto happen, because tomorrow was Christmas. There was no more time.
And his father had let him down.
As the day had turned to night, Miles had found himself putting ornaments on the tree with help from his nanny. She’d meant the world to him, and he was right when he said that having her had been a good thing. He’d have liked for his own child to have a similar experience.
But Chelsea was right, too. Miles knew that his father had felt freer to leave him alone on that occasion, and so many others, because he had known there was someone else at home taking care of things.
I won’t be like that,he told himself firmly.A nanny is a good thing to have. I’m not just doing this to get out of spending time with my kid. It won’t be that way for us.
But for a moment, doubt took root in his mind, and he wondered.Wouldit be that way for his child? Would there be nights when his son or daughter sat there longing for him to get home? Was he going to let his kid down, the way his father had let him down so many times?
He didn’t want to think so. He wanted to believe he was better than that. But the truth was, he couldn’t be sure… and the thought of it had him spiraling.
CHAPTER 12
CHELSEA
“Ican’t believe you’re actually doing this,” Chelsea said as the two of them got out of the car. “I thought you were going to bail again.”
Miles raised his eyebrows. “After the dressing-down you gave me the last time I canceled plans?”
Chelsea laughed. “I know I was hard on you.” She had been regretting all week the things she’d said, ever since they’d argued about hiring a nanny. Once she’d slept on it, she was forced to realize that having a nanny would be a good thing for their child, and she agreed with his decision to hire someone. She had just been spooked by the fact that he’d abandoned her, left her to have dinner alone with Silas. Even though that had turned out to be a positive experience, it was anxiety-inducing to say the least when she thought of what it would be like for a child to be raised by a father like that.
It would be like my own childhood. Like my own father, who was never around for me. I want my kid to have a better life than I did. That’s the problem here. I was ready to be a singlemother before I met Miles, but if I have the option of a father for my child, that’s an option I want to take.
Now they were crossing the county fairgrounds toward the ticket booth. This outing had been Silas’s idea, which was probably the most shocking part of the whole affair. Chelsea could hardly believe the famous entrepreneur wanted to go to the county fair with his son. It didn’t seem to fit the man she had heard about for so many years.
Although, if I’m honest, it perfectly fits the man I met in the hospital and at his home the other day. Miles did say that he’s changed in recent years. I guess this is what he was talking about.
Chelsea fell a few paces behind Miles, turning to look at the cheap, ritzy lights of the fair attractions. To think she would be spending an evening with the Aspins at a place like this! There was something charming about it, though she wondered what the appeal for them could be.
Silas was waiting by the ticket booth, as promised. She watched as Miles strode over to him, taking in the way his pace quickened and lengthened at the sight of his father. He really did love the man, Chelsea thought, her heart warming. She couldn’t help feeling affection for Miles at the sight of him embracing his father and looking him up and down. He might claim that he had only wanted this baby for business reasons, but whether he realized it or not, Miles Aspin was a family man at heart.
Of course he isn’t going to neglect our child. I don’t know how I could have thought he would. He might be too invested in his work, but I know he’s a caring person. He’s going to be a good father. I should give him the benefit of the doubt a bit more.
She approached the two men and smiled at Silas. “It’s good to see you out of the house,” she said.
“Oh, Melody didn’t want to let me go, but I convinced her,” Silas said. “I got us some tickets.” He handed a strip to Chelsea and one to Miles.
“I don’t know why you wanted to comehere, though,” Miles said, wrinkling his nose. He accepted his tickets with a frown and looked as if he wasn’t sure what he was going to do with them.
“It’s fun, Miles,” Chelsea encouraged. “Don’t you think we’ll bring the baby here someday?”
“I don’t see why we’d ever do that. This place smells like manure and frying oil.”
“That’s because it’s a fair,” Chelsea said. “Everything is fried in oil.”
“Well, that’s disgusting.”
Chelsea laughed. “Oh, stop it,” she said. “I’m going to get us a funnel cake to share.”
“What is afunnel cake?”
“You’ve never had a funnel cake?” She turned to Silas. “He’s never had funnel cake?”
“There was never much opportunity for it when he was growing up,” Silas said with a grin. “I mean, there were a couple of times we did big elaborate birthday parties for him, but those were always catered, and even the children had nice things to eat.”
