Chapter 16
At 6:30 pm, Emma and I both hear Ice's Harley pull in the drive. He comes in the house and goes straight to Emma. "Hey, beautiful," he says as he walks over to her and kisses the top of her head lovingly. "Honey, that smells wonderful. I'm famished." He adds, "Reb and Hawk should be right behind me. They made a stop at the liquor store on the way. And the rest of the boys are coming behind them."
"Oh, good," I reply. "Dinner is just about ready."
"I didn't fuck things up by inviting the boys, did I?" he asks.
"Naw. You know me, Ice, I'm used to cooking for an army. We have plenty," I tell him. He sits down next to Emma and begins to inquire about her day. I work at putting the finishing touches on dinner so that everything will be ready when everyone gets here.
Not long after Ice returned, in walk Ari, Rebel, and Hawk. Ari had gone into to town to run some errands—she must have returned just as Hawk and Rebel arrived. Rebel has his arm around Ari lovingly … it's good to see them both happy. Not long after their arrival, the rest of the boys filter in. The house is now full of noise and laughter. I sure have missed this. It was always like this at the clubhouse, but since the explosion…well, things have been different. It's nice to see things falling back to some type of normalcy.
"Dinner's ready," I call out from the kitchen.
"Great, just let me drop these bags in my room and I'll be right out," Ari says.
"Honey, that smells amazing," Hawk says as he strolls into the kitchen. He comes up behind me and kisses me on my neck. My body tingles at his touch.
"I'll give you a hand," Rebel says as he follows Ari into her room.
During dinner, Rebel tells us a little about his parents and family, but when the conversation gets too involved, Ice quickly stops him and changes the subject. Instead, we talk about Ari leaving for school in the morning. She is not happy about it, but Ice insists. And like a good sister, she doesn't protest.
When dinner is over, Ari and Emma help me clean up. The majority of the club leaves after thanking me for a good meal.
Hawk and Rebel remain with Ice as they take their scotch and cigars and head for the game room. They start a game of pool as they smoke and drink.
After the kitchen is spotless, we join the guys and watch Ice and Hawk finish their game. When Hawk wins, he suggests that the girls play the guys.Oh, I'm down for that.It’s a good thing us girls are not competitive where pool is concerned. The guys, on the other hand, are. Well, at least at first—but then Emma and I kept them laughing so much, I think they forgot to care.
When we are done playing, Ice announces that he and Emma are calling it a night.
"Yeah," Hawk says, "I need to go, too." He looks over to me. "Walk me out?" he asks me. I smile as we walk toward the door.
My heart soars as I walk out of the house with Hawk. When we get to his bike he just stares at me as he continues to hold onto my hand.
"Is this really gonna happen?" he asks.
I nod and reply, "I hope so."
"And Ice?"
"I'm not gonna lie to you; I have feelings for Ice. I always have." I see his expression turn from hopeful to disappointment and it breaks my heart, but he needs to understand. "Baby, look at me." He does, and I continue. "You, more than anyone, know what a mess I was when I came to this club. Ice is my savior because he gave me a home and a family. I thought I was in love with him. But when Emma came back, I realized that although it may be love, it's not the kind of love that he has for Emma or that I have always had for you. He may have been my savior, but you were always my confidant, my rock, and as I'm slowly learning, my love." I'm not being completely honest with Hawk, but I want him to understand that Ice is my past and he is my future. Hopefully, we can build on that.
"I needed to hear that," he says.
"And I needed to say it."
He caresses the side of my cheek and then says, "When you hooked up with Ice, I thought we were done. He is my prez and best friend, and there was no way I was going to interfere with that. I couldn't go against my prez. But then Emma came into the picture and I realized that he had been in love with her all his life. She was the woman for him. As much as I hated seeing you hurting, I was hopeful. But you had already pushed me so far out of your life I didn't know what to think."
"I'm sorry, I should never have pushed you away. But I never wanted there to be any trouble between you and Ice. So I felt that keeping my distance would make things easier."
He wraps his arm around my waist and pulls me close against him. "Are you still pushing me away?" he asks breathlessly.
"No," I reply, feeling his hot breath against my lips as he bends down to kiss me. At first, his lips are soft, hesitant, as if he is afraid that I will push him away. But when a moan escapes my lips, he knows there is no way in hell I'm pushing him away and he deepens the kiss, pulling me closer and ravaging my mouth.
Instinctively, I wrap my arms around his neck and my body molds against him. I can feel his erection pushing against my core as my tongue meets every desperate stroke of his tongue. I want him to take me right here, so I reach for the buckle of his belt. His hand immediately goes to my hand to stop me.
"Oh God, Honey," he pleads. "I want this, God knows how much I want this, but I'm saying no. Not in Ice's driveway."
"But …" I interrupt, but he quickly stops me from saying any more.
