As we walk, he leans over and whispers, "You look great!"
I beam. I'm glad that he thinks this is gonna work. Me? I'm not so sure. I reply, "Thanks!"
As the evening progresses, we continue to talk and mingle with the guests. Around 10:45, Ice's phone beeps. He looks down and then leans in and says, "Showtime. You ready for this?" I nod and he immediately pulls me close. He begins to nuzzle my neck and kisses me right behind my ear. I can't help but giggle.God, I love it when he does that.
We walk over to some other brothers and their old ladies hanging around the portable bar that was placed outside. We talk with them for a while and then I turn toward Ice and slide my arms up against his torso and latch them together behind his neck. He hesitates briefly, but my look quickly reminds him why we are doing this. Ice is not a cheater, so I am sure he is dealing with some pretty harsh demons right now. Then, the look on his face changes and I can see that he has overcome his issues. He leans in and kisses me. The kiss is nice, but it doesn't have the passion that we once shared. It's in this moment that I realize that it would have never worked between us. Suddenly, the dread I had been feeling up to this point is gone and the whole charade gets easier.
We continue to carry on like a couple who are very much in love. As time passes, I can see that Ice is getting antsy. Finally around 11:45, we decide to make our departure and head for the bedroom as planned. About 15 minutes after we leave the party, Ice's phone beeps. Looking at his phone, he says, "Honey, we're good. The Satans left. You can head back to your room now."
I admit that I am disappointed. I was actually having a lot of fun. "Ok, if you don't need anything else."
I walk to the door and just before I turn the knob to leave, he calls after me, "Hey." I turn back to look at him. "You did great tonight. I know this wasn't easy for you. Thanks!"
I smirk and say, "Actually, Ice, it was a lot easier than I thought." I step through the door and then add, "But it's over now. Goodnight, Ice. Sleep well."
I know he thinks I'm hurting and doesn't understand. But that's ok. I'm better now and life is going to be better as well.
