I had no clue just how much everything was affecting her, and I should have. It makes me feel like a complete asshole. Apparently, that rubs off on Woodcroft because he didn’t realize how much of a limbo she’s been in. To be fair, he has a lot on his plate, and taking care of one woman isn’t at the top of his priorities.
But he knows a guy who knows a guy who is going to send over a couple of super-cheap apartment options in my area. I’d love for her to just move in with me, but I also realize that’s not what she wants.
I also picked up a phone for her on the way back to the safehouse. Nothing crazy, but it’s access to the outside world. Something she really hasn’t had in months. Not to mention access for me to make sure she and the baby are okay if I’m not in the area. Emergencies happen all the time, and I won’t be caught out without a way for her to get in contact with me.
God, we’re such dumbasses.Lex should have said something. He knew she was completely alone and didn’t tell any of us.
No, I can’t blame him. He was doing what he always does for someone in WITSEC. It isn’t his job to place people back in the real world.
The drive back to the house from the office is a drag, full of traffic and too much time away from Claire.
I haven’t pushed her for more although I’m dying for it. Today opened my eyes to the fact that she probably isn’t remotely ready for a relationship. She hasn’t faced anything that’s happened over the last few months, and I think it’s hitting her full force. The truth of that was very apparent today at the MET.
I’ve only been thinking about how much I want her and to be in her life in any way. Add in the fact that we’ll be parents sooner rather than later, and I’m ready to jump in headfirst. I didn’t even stop to think about how life has looked for her recently.
That stops now.
My goal now is to help her get back into society and doing whatever makes her happy for a living, and get set up for the baby, all while trying to get to the bottom of all these stolen artifacts.
I did say that I wanted out of undercover assignments.
As I walk back into the house, I realize just how late it is. Claire is crashed out on the couch, with a notebook over her torso like a blanket. I grab the blanket that’s off to the side of the small couch and replace the notebook with it. While I’m closing the notebook, a few words catch my eye.
I know I shouldn’t. I know it’s an invasion of privacy, and yet my eyes don’t get the memo. I read the list she made. One item, I managed to cross off for her. Then I continue on about her travel blog. Ideas about how to navigate it if she can’t revive it. Thoughts about what to turn it into. New interests. All of it is a jumbled mess of lists that I can’t stop reading.
What makes my heart stop in my chest is:5. Tread carefully with Adam.I don’t want her to ever feel like she needs to tread carefully with me. Maybe I’m coming on too strong? Maybe she just doesn’t like me like I do her? Maybe the trauma of all things Oscar Cano is too much for her to look past? I wouldn’t blame her in the least. She might just be focused on the baby, which would make sense too.
I spend the rest of the night coming up with more over-the-top plans in order to help her cope. They get more and more exaggerated the darker it gets outside, and before I know it, the soft rays of the sunrise break through the front window.
“What time is it?” Claire’s sleep-laden voice startles me.
“Early,” I murmur.
She groans and curls up in the blanket before falling asleep again.
I slump back in the chair I pulled over from the dining room. I need sleep, but my brain is so wired I’m not sure I can leave this spot.
Flipping back to the first list Claire made, I pull out my phone.
Me:
Do we have any contacts for affordable housing? I had Woody on the trail, but I know he’s busy.
Lex:
Is this for whom I think it is?
Juliette:
I’m sure I can dig up something.
Woodcroft:
Be careful with this, Adam ...
Me:
She’s been sitting in this godforsaken safe house for six months. She isn’t technically in WITSEC, so let me help her restart her life. We have a fucking baby coming in four months. I’m trying my best here.
