I’m not sure how we get to that point. I don’t think it’ll be easy, but I know I want to try. He makes me want to try. The sudden clarity is like a wave of silence in my brain. My nonstop thoughts are finally quiet.
“How are you feeling?” he asks while not acknowledging my words.
“About the same, honestly. I’m not very good at being sick. I’m sorry for getting emotional all the time.”
“Don’t apologize. I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I got a little worried when you called in sick after visiting Austin.” He has the grace to look a little sheepish, and I very slowly put two and two together.
“You thought something happened, and I called in sick to what? Avoid you?”
“Umm…” He grabs the back of his neck with one hand, his cheeks turning a super cute shade of pink.
“Hey.” I clear my throat again and make sure that he really hears me. “I’m committed to being with you. If things change for me, you will be the first to know, but I honestly don’t see that happening. I don’t want you to feel like you’re waiting for the other shoe to drop every day.” The way he’s feeling is entirely my doing. But if I’m able to give him some of the clarity I just found, maybe it’ll help.
The look in his eyes is pure affection and love, and my heart pounds in my chest because, for the first time, I feel the exact same way.
“My turn to apologize for jumping to conclusions and not taking you at your word.”
“No apology needed, Ledg. I am eternally grateful you came over, even if I still think you’ll end up sick. And I’ll feel guilty as hell about it when it happens.” I cuddle into his side as he wraps his arm around me. I feel him press a kiss to the crown of my head, and I sink further into his warmth.
“Do you want some soup?”
“In a minute,” I murmur as my eyes get heavier.
I don’t even remember falling asleep, but when I wake up again, I’m in my bed surrounded by blankets and damn near dripping sweat.
Flinging the blankets off of me, I stumble out of bed and start stripping off my clothes, trying to get out of the grossness breaking a fever leaves behind.
“Well, it’s good to see you up, baby,” I hear from behind.
I cringe, realizing how much he’s seen and dealt with over the last day or so.
God, I don’t even know what day it is.
“You didn’t need to stay,” I tell him, feeling very insecure right now.
He doesn’t acknowledge my words, just walks past me and turns the shower on. He ducks down and picks up my sweat-laden clothes, and I flinch. Reaching out, I attempt to grab them from him because that’s a level of closeness I’m not sure I’ll ever be ready for, but he turns around and heads back out of the bathroom.
“I’m going to run a load of laundry and get all of your bedding clean. I have dinner in the oven, and it’ll be ready when you’re done with your shower.”
Dumbfounded. I’m completely dumbfounded.
“Umm…”
He turns back around. “I had to grow up at a young age. Being the sole guardian for Willow and Lennox wasn’t a walk in the park. I had tohandle more sick days than I care to admit. I promise this is nothing, and I promise I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t want to be.”
We lock eyes for an extended second, and I feel like I see all the way to his soul and it’s beautiful.
“I need to take care of you, Ains. Just try to let me, okay?” He says it so softly like he’s scared I’m going to push him away. But pushing him away right now is that last thing I want to do.
But I really do need to take a damn shower and get some actual food in my system.
I slowly walk up to him as he tilts his head. Lifting up on my top toes, I press a soft kiss to his lips before pulling back.
“I think I like you taking care of me.” I step back with a smirk before turning around and stepping into my shower.
Chapter 30
Ledger
