Rina:
Call me later, big bro.
I stare at the screen for a minute longer and then decide to handle her later. This doesn’t need to be a big deal—she knows how to keep a secret. I just need to tell her to keep it to herself before she blabs to Willow and Lennox.
I hop into the truck, flustered as hell.
“Everything okay?” Ainsley’s voice makes me jump, and I realize how on edge I am.
“Everything is perfect,” I lie.
I lie because I don’t want to break the spell. I lie because Rina won’t be a problem if I talk to her. I lie because I can’t stand the thought of losing Ainsley because of a freak coincidence. And I can’t lose her.
Chapter 27
Ainsley
Remembering the conversation at dinner a few nights ago is making me itchy.
It’s stupid, really. I asked Ledger first what his life goals were. It made complete sense that he would reciprocate. I just didn’t realize I had absolutely no answer for him. Or for me, for that matter.
Where the fuck do I see myself in five years?
I wasn’t any closer to an answer than I was when I’d moved here, and I fucking hated it.
The other thing bugging me was Ledger’s demeanor when we left the restaurant after our date. He looked like he had seen a ghost, and it sent me into a panic that we had been spotted.
But he didn’t say anything, and I trust him.
What I don’t trust is me to actually figure my shit out.
I know what I want to do before I even pick up my phone.
“Hey, Ains. Everything okay?”
“Hey. Yeah, everything’s fine. I was just calling to see if I could leave work a little early today so I could go drive to see Larkin.” It is weird asking your boyfriend for time off, especially when we don’t acknowledge we are dating at work. Admittedly, it is by my doing, but it is starting to feel weirder and weirder as time goes on.
“Absolutely, and if you need more time than just the weekend, let me know.”
God, he is so understanding. Here I am, having a third-life crisis, and he’s doing everything in his power to help me, in true Ledger style. And maybe that’s why I’m so conflicted. Why my chest is seizing up tighter and tighter as I think about my future.
“Thanks, Ledg,” I whisper, incapable of forming more words at the moment.
He stays on the phone in silence, and I try to say something—anything—to reassure him. I feel like he can tell I’m losing it a little, but I don’t know how to communicate it.
“I’ll keep you updated if I’m going to be late on Monday.” And I hang up. Business and straight to the point. It feels wrong, and I know with more clarity than ever that I need my sister. I need a sounding board for this entire situation, and who better than someone who married their office rival?
A text comes through almost immediately.
Ledger:
Please call me if you need anything. I’ll drive down there if I need to, whatever you need.
Tears cloud my vision, and I know taking a couple of days away is the right move. I’m genuinely falling for Ledger, but it also feels like I’m leading him on because I have no clue where my life is heading.
It makes me feel like shit because he is a damn good man. Initial meeting aside, he’s proven time and time again that I’m a priority to him. And I want—no, need—to do the same for him. He deserves that and so much more.
Me:
