Ainsley Mathews:
Do you not like it? I can change anything, it’s not a problem.
Fuuuccckkk my slow brain right now.
Ledger Hutton:
NO! No, it looks amazing. I’m just shocked you finished it all today.
Ainsley Mathews:
Oh! Yeah, well, I like stuff like this, so it was actually fun.
Ainsley Mathews:
Is there anything else that needs to get done today?
Ledger Hutton:
No,that’s above and beyond, thank you.
This conversation isn’t going how I thought it would. She’s acting like nothing happened, and if I’m completely honest with myself, it’s making me angry. Which is irrational. If I don’t talk to her tonight, it feels like I never will, like I’ll just brush it all under the rug, never knowing if I could fix things or if I could actually make things right with her.
Fuck it.
Ledger Hutton:
I do need something. Can we talk? Like actually talk about last night? I could come to you or you could come over here. We could just chat on here about it, anything.
I roll my eyes at myself. I sound like a needy teenager, which I guess tracks considering that’s how I’ve been acting since she got back into town. Jesus, I need to get my head together.
Ainsley Mathews:
I could come over there for a few minutes, but I have to meet someone for dinner.
Who the hell is she meeting? Is it Oakley? Did I just miss my shot?
Ledger Hutton:
Perfect, thank you.
It’s all I can say at this point. Now, I just need to figure out what I’m going to say to her when she gets here.
Chapter 14
Ainsley
You know what I learned about myself today? I’m very, very good at avoidance.
After talking to Rina and thinking about this entire situation, I just … didn’t want to think about it anymore. So, when I woke up, I didn’t. I jumped into work and not only finished up all my usual tasks incredibly fast, but I also finished the entire damn presentation that was supposed to take the rest of the week.
Honestly, the sheer numbness I’m feeling right now reminds me a little too much of how I was back in Austin. I don’t want to revert back to that Ainsley; I was just starting to like this new version of me.
When Ledger messaged me, acting like it’s your run-of-the-mill workday, I followed his lead.
Did I purposely say I was meeting someone for dinner to irk him a little? I’m not above a little pettiness at the moment, but the reality is, I’m going to my parents’ for dinner. He doesn’t need to know that, though. Plus, I have an easy out if I go to his house instead of him coming here.
The bigger issue I’m avoiding is that I actuallylikeLedger. If I piece together the two versions of him I’ve seen, I like him. But the lying is something I can’t get behind. My past has ensured that forgiveness is something I hold close and don’t offer easily. But have I jumped the gun with Ledger? Larkin’s words from yesterday echo in my head.I’m not sure what Ledger’s reasoning was, but I suspect there’s more to it.This iswhy I agreed to go talk to him. Because deep down, I’m hoping there’s more to it.
