“No. I want to dance with you.”
Lela was a captivating vision when she smiled, but the way the light hit her face made it especially spellbinding. “Okay.” She fit perfectly in his arms as they began to dance. “She’s Goneseems like an odd song choice for a wedding reception. Isn’t it about a woman leaving a man?”
“Yes. I’m sure my mom picked it. It might even be her way of dropping a hint for Stuart.”
Lela looked at him quizzically. “Are things not going well?”
“He wants more than she’s willing to give. Let’s put it that way.”
She moved a little closer to him, only an inch or two, but his body took it as a positive sign, sending pulses to every nerved ending.
“I love this song,” she said. “I feel like I didn’t fully appreciate Hall & Oates when I was younger. I get it more now.”
“I blamePrivate Eyes.Too silly.”
“Oh, no. I beg to differ. It’s a perfect pop song. Just try to get it out of your head.”
“I miss talking about music with you.” He sensed that this little confession, however inconsequential, deserved to be made. “You know how the DJ played Coldplay for the first song? It made me think of you.”
Lela reared back her head. “That record came out in 1999. That was way after college.”
“Actually, it was 2000.” He pulled her a little closer, and drew in the sweet smell of her hair. “The first time I heard it, the only thing I wanted to do was call you so we could talk about it.”
“Oh, my God, Donovan. That’ssoweird.”
Now that was disappointing. He’d thought she would say it was sweet. “I don’t think it’s weird at all.”
“That’s not what I’m saying. I had the exact same experience. A couple of times.”
The goofy grin that spread across Donovan’s face was too much to take. It made his face hurt. “When? With who?”
“Oh, gosh. The Foo Fighters for sure. Weezer… Macy Gray… Bon Iver… Eminem… Beyoncé. There’s been so much great music since we were in college.”
“Yes to all of those. I’m also thinking The Strokes. Outkast. The Killers. Arcade Fire.” How he loved that she’d had the same impulse, but how he hated that neither of them had acted on it. “The big question is why neither of us reached out.”
“I know. One of us should have.”
“But we didn’t.” He sighed, resigned to the fact that he had to spill his guts again. “I didn’t reach out because I thought you wouldn’t speak to me. I wasn’t sure I could handle that.”
“I would’ve talked to you. I totally would have.”
The regrets in his life were piling so high he was going to need a shovel. “Tell me why you didn’t call. Or send an email.”
“I was worried I’d blown our entire friendship out of proportion. That maybe our friendship didn’t mean the same thing to you that it meant to me.”
“Of course it meant the same to me. It did.”
“But you got panicky when we slept together. And right after that, like days later, you got engaged to Genevieve. So I don’t know that I could come to another conclusion.”
“I got panicky because our friendship meant so much. I was worried I’d ruined everything when I kissed you. That started it all.”
“Another thing I didn’t know.”
“I’m sorry. I should have told you.”
The DJ segued intoTime after Timeby Cyndi Lauper. Lela peered up into his face with a touch of melancholy in her eyes. The world around them blurred. The music wasn’t helping—every lyric about looking back and putting memories in a suitcase. If he had any chance at all with her, he hated the idea of missing it. But he was also terrified to convince her of anything. If he failed, so much around him would suffer, including his relationship with Echo.
“I want to kiss you right now.” The words barely made their way out of his mouth, but they were there, circling around them like birds or butterflies.
