"Bed, now, remember?"
At that reminder, he lifted his head, and gave me a truly wicked grin. "Show me your bedroom, Sunshine."
I turned, and he swatted me on the ass as I hurried down the hall to my childhood bedroom. It hadn't changed much since we had redecorated during my senior year of high school. The walls were a light sage green, with white bedding on the queen-sized bed and navy-blue accents. It had a tranquil spa-like feel that I still loved. Nico followed me into the room, turning to shut and lock the door behind him. As his glance fell on the bed, his gorgeous lips turned up in a smile.
"I'm glad to see that bed, Sunshine. I was afraid you would still have a twin bed or something in here, and we would have needed more room than that for what I want to do to you."
He reached behind his head to grasp the neckline of his T-shirt, pulling it over his head and letting it drop to the floor. He slipped his shoes and socks off and kicked them out of the way. Without taking his eyes off me, he opened his belt, popped the top button on his jeans, and lowered the zipper slightly.
Oh, sweet Jesus, he was a beautiful man. I'd seen him without his shirt many times over the years, but this felt so much more intimate. My gaze dropped to the six-pack abs, trim waist, and that sexy-as-hell dip leading to his groin, then - dear God, the bulge in the front of his jeans was huge. 'Oh, fuuuuck me', I thought to myself.
Nico flashed me that cocky grin of his and reached for me. "Don't worry, I will definitely be fucking you."
Oh, I guess I hadn't actually kept that thought to myself after all. Oops.
He wrapped me in his arms, both hands sliding down to grip my ass. He pulled me tight against him, lifting me to my toes and holding me there to get me at just the right height before grinding his hips against mine. Our bare chests pressed together, and I noticed how warm his skin was against mine. He had a smattering of dark hair on his chest, not too much, but just enough to provide a delicious friction against my nipples as we moved together.
He lowered me back to my feet, as he slid his hands from my ass, around to the front of my jeans. He ran his fingers along thewaistband at my sides, which tickled like crazy. I squirmed and giggled, and he laughed and did it again.
"I'm going to find every single ticklish spot you have, Sunshine, and I'm going to nibble on each and every one," he promised.
His hands moved to the button at the front of my jeans, popping it open with one hand and sliding my zipper down with the other in one coordinated movement. He eased both hands just inside the open flap, grabbing my hips before sliding around to my ass again. He kissed me again for just a moment, then pushed my jeans over my hips and down my legs. He bent slightly to help me step out of them, before tossing them to the side. He straightened to his full height and stared at me, his gaze raking so slowly and so intently down my body that it almost felt like he was actually touching me. Then it hit me. I was standing stark naked - except for a pair of tiny blue panties - in front of a half-naked Nico fucking Peretti. Images of those other women, those other perfect women, slammed into my brain.What the hell have I done?
I whirled around, desperately looking for something I could cover myself with. I felt Nico move up behind me, running his hands up my arms, then sliding his arms across my chest to pull me gently back against him. He bent his head, so his face was next to mine, and his chin rested on my shoulder.
"What's wrong, Sunshine?" he asked quietly.
The sting of tears starting to build, as the memory of all of those hateful online comments came rushing back. The images of all of the other women he'd been with were running through my mind like a bad movie, with that stupid Sesame Street song as the soundtrack. One of these things is not like the other...
I could feel my body start to tremble. I wasn't sure if it was nerves, anxiety, dread, shame, or embarrassment, but I suspected it was a combination of all of them. I felt Nico clasp me a little tighter.
"Allie?" he asked again. "It's OK. Whatever it is, it's OK, I promise you."
The first tear fell, and then the next, and the next, until I was shaking with the effort of holding in my sobs. I heard Nico groan, then he quickly turned me and wrapped me in his arms, pressing my face into his neck, and crooning softly to me. "It's OK, sweetheart. It's OK. Please just tell me what's wrong. It will be OK, just tell me."
He held me like that for several minutes, rubbing his hands up and down my back, then stroking the side of my face, my hair, and then up and down my back again. As my crying slowed down, he pulled away slightly to peer down at me.
"You're breaking my heart here, Sunshine," he said with a catch in his voice. "Talk to me."
I stepped out of his arms and grabbed for the cashmere throw draped across the foot of the bed. I wrapped it around my shoulders, and clutched it closed in front of me with one hand. It draped over me, covering me to mid-thigh. I sat on the edge of the bed, and Nico walked over to sit next to me. He leaned over and kissed my temple.
"Tell me what's wrong," he whispered in my ear before straightening up. "Did I move too fast? We don't have to do anything you aren't ready for."
"No, it's just...no, you didn't move too fast. I'd just forgotten for a minute. You touched me and kissed me and made meforgot for a minute that I'm not like the women you normally sleep with."
He put his hand on my chin and turned my face so he could look at me. "Allie, sweetheart, please don't compare yourself to anyone else. You are the woman I love. You are the woman I want. You are the woman I've been dreaming about for years now." He grabbed my free hand and pressed it against the hard ridge of his cock beneath his zipper. "This is what you do to me. Only you. This is all for you."
"It's not that simple. I'm not a size zero, Nico. Not even close. I wear a size fourteen, which isn't a big deal to most of the world, but in your world? Trust me, in your world, that's a big fucking deal. My breasts are big, and they're natural, so they aren't nice and perky anymore. They sag a little, and I have stretch marks on my stomach and a leftover baby-pooch that I can't fucking get rid of. I've got enough hips and ass for two women, and I haven't had a goddamned thigh-gap since I hit puberty!"
Nico stood up and took a few steps away from the bed, before swinging around to look at me again. "Are you done?" he asked angrily. "Are you fucking done insulting the woman I love?"
I rolled my eyes, getting pretty pissed off myself. "I'm not saying you don't love me. I'm saying I don't see how you can want me when you look like you, and I look like me. You're built like some kind of a god, Nico, and I'm built like the 'before' picture in a weight-loss ad!"
