The way my body reacts to that thought is absurd.
My heartbeat kicks up as I picture Mira curled against me with her legs draped across mine. My fingers flex with the needto pull her into my lap and hold her there. Every muscle in my body aches with the desperate, impossible need to experience the life I’ve wanted for as long as I can remember.
Even if I only get to borrow it.
“Is anyone here yet?” I ask, buttoning up my shirt. We still have an hour or so before the ceremony starts, but when I went to grab a drink a while ago, I could hear plenty of voices from the sanctuary.
“Is anyone here?” Gray asks, laughing. “Dude. Half of the fucking town is already here. I started coming in through the front entrance, but realized I’d be sidelined quickly. So I snuck around back and came in through the basement.”
My fingers stall against my buttons.Mira’s probably a nervous wreck.
Gray faces me. “You doing okay? I can’t tell if you’re nervous or not, so I don’t really know what you need.”
Yeah, well, me either, Gray.
I return to my buttons and contemplate an answer to his question. As far as my level of nervousness, I know one thing—it should be higher. I’m getting married today, to my dream woman, to boot. But she isn’t marrying me because she feels the same way. That should make me more anxious than it does.
For some reason, I’m suspiciously calm. The idea of marrying Mira St. James is as natural as breathing. I keep reminding myself that this is temporary. That in twelve months, I’ll be in a courtroom instead of a church.
But no matter how this ends, I’m still marrying the only woman I’ve ever loved.I’m still marrying Mira.
A knock raps against the door, and Gray and I both look up.
“Come in,” I say.
Markie pokes her head around the doorframe. “Hey, guys. I have your boutonnieres for you.” She places three small white boxes on a table by the door. “Need anything else?”
“No, but we only need two,” I say. “Gray’s standing with me. Since you were the only one standing up with Mira, I’m only standing with Gray to keep it even.”
She snorts. “We all know that Brooks will be involved somehow, even if that means sneaking up behind you as Mira walks down the aisle. I’m just thinking ahead.”
“Damn. You’re good,” Gray says, chuckling.
“Thanks, Markie,” I say.
“You’re very welcome, my soon-to-be brother-in-law.” She grins, watching the realization unfold on my face. “See you guys later.”
She gives us a little wave and then disappears.
“I gotta take a piss,” Gray says. “I’ll be back.”
I take a breath as the door closes and I’m alone again. My hand slides into my pocket, the cool coin in the bottom smooth against my fingertips. I grabbed it before I left the house.
Laughter billows into the room from somewhere in the distance, lending credence to Gray’s claim that there are already a bunch of people here for the wedding. I heard Mira tell Lolly that we only wanted a few people. I can’t help wondering if Lolly got her permission to widen the invite list, or if Mira will be jolted when she realizes that we’re doing this in front of the whole damn town.
It doesn’t matter to me, but it might to her because she doesn’t want this. She’s going along with it. But I saw the look on her face at Lolly’s. If she had her way, she would’ve had her grandmother sell the house and moved on.
I grab my phone and type out a text.
Me: How are you doing?
Mira’s response comes immediately.
Mira: Just hanging out. Markie went to do a few things and to find more bobby pins for my hair. How about you?
Me: Are you alone then?
Mira: Yeah.
