Truth was, I was sick of living in my father’s shadow. I was tired of trying to live up to his expectations. But what did I know about my future? How did I know if my plans were really what I wanted?
How does anyone know?
Maybe it had just been easy, following the path my parents wanted. At least then, I didn’t have to worry about failing. They were a safety net that I was used to having and the idea of jumping without the knowledge that they were there scared me.
More than I wanted to admit.
I guess Collette and I had more in common than I thought. My parents and their plans for me were my own personal hoodie. If I truly cared about Collette, I’d take my own advice. I’d get over the stupid insecurities that were holding me back and I’d be the manIwanted to be.
I’d bethe man Collette deserved.
My heart poundedas I slipped into my parents’ room that afternoon. I wasn’t normally a ninja, but right now, I didn’t want to face my father and his disappointment. But I also didn’t want to lose Yale and my potential to go there.
Sure, I’d decided that I didn’t want my parents to dictate my life but I also didn’t want to throw my future away. Being a rock star really didn’t pay like being a lawyer did. And I wasn’t naïve to think I had enough talent or musical ambition to make it big.
Truth was, I wasn’t sure what I wanted for my future, other than Collette. I guess I just wanted the chance to figure it out for myself. College was the ideal place to do that, and a great university would offer every opportunity I could imagine.
So I settled with the next best thing. Sneaking around behind my parents’ backs. There was a chance I could still meet with the recruiterandplay in Ryan’s band. If my plan worked.
My parents’ room was still and pristine. I felt like I was walking into a hospital room with how white and shiny all their surfaces were. My parents took appearance seriously—even into their bedroom.
I rolled my eyes as I tiptoed over to my dad’s desk and began to riffle through his papers on it.Bills. Proposals. Emails.
All of it was boring stuff. Not at all what I needed.
I turned my back on the door and focused on the bulletin board above Dad’s computer. I was looking for the recruiter’s number or information. Any way of getting a hold of him. Or her. I wasn’t really sure.
“What are you doing?” Chrissy’s voice made me jump.
I knocked over a container full of pens as I whipped around. Wincing, I scrambled to keep them from falling on the ground. “Geez, Chris,” I said as I glared at her.
She giggled as she walked over and helped me clean up. “What are you doing?” she asked again.
When we finished putting everything back in place, she straightened and folded her arms. I knew that look. She wasn’t going anywhere.
I sighed as I turned my attention back to searching. “I’m looking for something.” I hoped that would appease her, but it didn’t and when I glanced over at her, I saw her raised eyebrows and her finger tapping her forearm.
“Okay,” I responded. “I’m looking for the contact info of the Yale recruiter.”
“Why?”
“I want to invite them to something.” I shot her a pleading look. “Can you help me?”
She narrowed her eyes. “If you tell me what the something is, I’ll tell you what I know.”
I scoffed. I didnotappreciate the shake down my little sister was giving me. But on the other hand, I was proud ofher tenacity. “Ryan wants me to play with his band tonight. If I invite the recruiter as well, two birds, one stone.”
She furrowed her brow. “There are birds in the band?”
“What? No. It’s just a saying.”
She snorted. “Yeah, an old saying.” Then she stepped forward and lifted the corners of the paper and let them fall.
“I fulfilled my end of the bargain. Now it’s your turn.”
She studied me and then nodded. “Well, I don’t know his number but I know his name. Will that help?”
I pulled out my phone as my heart began to pound. I found my search tab and pressed it so the cursor was ready. “Yeah, that will work. What’s his name?”
