“Wait.” He got off the floor and grabbed both their shoes and his jacket. “I’m coming with.”
He made her put on her ankle boots, draped the jacket on her shoulders, and stayed one step behind as she staggered down into the garden. He fought the urge to spin her around and tell her how he couldn’t stand to hear another word about her ex-boyfriend, how glad he was she wasn’t gonna marry someone else, and if it weren’t for the comment she’d made about the movies, he’d be confessing his love to her right now.
She stopped before an oak tree for a few moments, and then she turned to face him. “I need to tell you something.”
“Sure,” he said.
She murdered one of her fingernails. “But you should know I don’t expect you to say or do anything in return.”
He smiled. “In return?”
“I didn’t say no to Kyle because I panicked or hesitated. And not just because he wasn’t right for me. I did it because…I’m in love with someone else.”
His smile vanished. “Che cazzo? No. No! I can’t… I don’t wanna hear this.” Had he hidden his feelings from her that well that she couldn’t feel him at all? Now she was going to blurt out about another fucker?
Bellowing screams raptured inside him. Yes, he had, and he’d waited too long—for reasons that didn’t seem to matter anymore when he almost lost her to another man tonight. He had no right to feel like this, but he did. And it hurt like hell, now he’d lost her all over again.
“Yes, you do,” she said.
He brought his hand to his chin, scratching it until it hurt. “No, Maggie, enough. I will not just stand and listen to this shit again. I—”
“Shut up and listen!” She drew a breath from the joint in her hand, looking him straight in the eye, taking a step forward. “I’m in love with you.”
He froze. Every muscle. Even his heart seemed to have ceased beating.
She took another step toward him. “Like I said, I don’t expect you to say or do anything. I just needed to say it out loud.” Her lips sucked on the last of the joint before she threw it away. “God, it felt so good to finally say it.”
He staggered in place, a sinking feeling in his stomach. “What do you meanfinally?”
“I mean…I have been…in love with you for a while now.” A sheepish smile drew on her face.
Slowly, he raised his eyebrows, cursing himself to hell and beyond in his mind for being such a cowardly idiot. “Why?”
Her lips parted and let out a short sigh.
“Why, Maggie?” he shouted.
“Why what?! Why am I in love with you?” She shook her head. “I don’t know why. All I know is that for once in my life, I’m hundred percent sure about something. I’m not confused or anxious anymore. There’s no room for maybes or what ifs. I just know.”
He moved closer, holding his eyes on her. The past eight years of WHAT THE FUCK opened a deep crack that ran to his bones.
“I’m sorry. I know the position this puts you in. I mean after tonight, and we’re gonna work together, and the fucking tabloids.” She threw her hand in the air. “I know it’s wrong, but I just don’t care if it’s right or wrong anymore.” She cursed. “Obviously, you’re upset, so I’m sorry. But that’s the only thing I’m sorry for. I’m not going to apologize for being in love with you because I’ve never—”
“Why, Maggie?” he interrupted, his voice coming out scratchy. “Why haven’t you told me this before?”
She blinked. “What difference does it make?”
The air felt too heavy in his chest. “You could’ve saved us a lot of time.”
It was a long moment before she spoke. “What do you mean?”
“You know what I mean.” He loved her. He fucking loved her. All the boundaries that stopped him from telling her how he felt, that condemned their love before it started, wouldn’t have mattered if he’d known she loved him, too. He’d have destroyed his career, spent every dime of his fortune and killed every person who dared stand in their way to be with her.
Her soft eyes became scrutinizing. “No, I don’t.”
“Yes, you do. You know exactly what I mean.” His lips shivered into a smile. “I’ve said it a thousand times before, but you never heard it. Now, I don’t need to say it for you to hear it.”
She said nothing for some time, leading to an uneasy silence. “Impossible.”
