Ciao for now, Kat
‘That’s absolutely not right,’ I shout at my phone. Right now my butt cheeks should be clenched as I discover that my former rival is on his way to the airport. Where’s the bit about Callum coming too? The bit about us collaborating?!
I try to ignore the sinking feeling in my stomach as I wait until I’m through security and can give Kat a call. Something’s not right. Well, everything’s not right, but today it feels like yet another thing has gone wrong.
‘Darling!’ Kat picks up.
‘Kat, sorry it’s so early,’ I say hurriedly, trying to remain polite as I listen to her green juice story again.
‘Everything okay?’ Kat asks.
‘I was just wondering when Callum’s getting here? You didn’t mention it in your email. He’s coming, right?’
‘Cal? Coming to the airport?’ Kat barks out a hacking laugh. ‘Why would he do that?’
The sense of foreboding worsens.
‘Because … because, you want us to become sympatico, remember?’
‘I don’t remember having that conversation with you, Nina.’
‘Well, no, you haven’t … yet. But I’m sure you’re considering it,’ I gabble, trying to sound encouraging.
A pause as the juicer whirs loudly into life.
‘I know that you two don’t get on, that’s for sure. But what I don’t understand is why you think Cal is going to pop byHeathrow before you fly to Australia, Nina. Are you feeling all right?’
I do wish people would stop asking me that.
‘Fine, thanks,’ I say hurriedly. ‘I thought you were going to send Callum on the trip to Australia with me, because he’s really good with the clients and you want us to learn and grow together. Remember? LEARN AND GROW?’
I’m getting desperate.
Kat is cackling down the line. ‘Learn and grow? That does sound the sort of bullshit I’d say, but honestly, Nina, the thought of you can Cal cooped up together on a long-haul flight to Australia is ridiculous. You’d kill each other! Ha ha ha. What a thought! You do come up with some crazy ideas. No, don’t worry. Cal is staying here in London while you travel to Australia.’
NO!
‘I actually think it would be a great idea,’ I scrabble, changing tack. ‘We could, you know, iron out our differences?’
‘Darling, whatever it is you’ve taken, stop it immediately. Go do some yoga and calm down, capiche? Cal is not coming to Australia and that’s the end of it. Now, we’re eating into my five-minute juice window so I really must dash. Ciao for now!’
‘Wait!’ I call desperately down the line. But Kat has hung up.
And Callum is not coming to the airport.
I twirl around helplessly until I come to a stop, the bag on my arm thudding painfully into my side. The airport starts to spin around me and I stagger over to a row of seats, slumping down onto one. My head is banging, my heart beating too fast, and I’m sweaty and cold at the same time. I’m properly panicking now.
He’s not coming?
Over and over in my head, I keep asking that same question.
Why? Could it be down to what happened yesterday? I finally got closure on the Hamish chapter of my life, but in doing so have I somehow changed the course of my future for good? Didthat one conversation with Hamish have knock-on effects for the next ten years which have somehow led to Callum now not being here? Am I going to have to go back to that Monday too, and redo it? That thought makes me feel physically sick and I know, somewhere deep in my gut, that I can’t make any more changes to the day I waved Hamish off. I got that right, I just know I did.
So why the hell is this happening, now?
I desperately try to reason this out, to make sense of the situation.
There are some things today that haven’t changed, I know that for sure. My flat, my job, the fact that Callum does work for Kat. That’s all still true. So why hasn’t he been sent on this trip? Kat sounded genuinely baffled when I suggested it on the phone just now. She knows we don’t get on and yet this time around, she’s decided that’s a reason to keep us apart, not force us together.
