‘We’re what?’
‘Landing.’
‘Landing where?’ I ask, gripped by panic. Are we making some kind of emergency stop? I’ve literally only just sat down!
‘In Perth. You’re on a plane and we’re about to land.’
I scowl at Callum’s condescending tone.
‘I know I’m on a plane, thank you very much. I’m not completely stupid, Callum.’
My colleague pulls a you-sure-about-that face.
‘But how are we in Perth already?’ I ask, a yawn taking over halfway through my sentence.
‘You’ve been out cold for the entire flight.’
Oh God. Out cold doesn’t sound great.
‘You mean … I slept through the whole journey?’
‘Mm-hm. You made some very cute little sleeping noises.’
Mortifying.
‘Don’t lie,’ I scowl.
‘I never do.’
I snap my eyes shut. Please tell me this is a dream. Please tell me I did not just spend the past five hours asleep next to Callum Bang, while snoring? It seems so unjust!
To make matters vastly worse, my stomach begins to rumble loudly.
‘You missed lunch, too,’ he points out somewhat unnecessarily as the plane begins to descend. ‘Here,’ he adds, handing me a packet of peanuts and a little bread roll.
‘For me?’ I ask stupidly.
‘Yes,’ says Callum. ‘I thought you might need something.’
‘That’s …’ I trail off.
‘That’s …’ he presses, eyebrow raised expectantly.
‘Actually very nice of you,’ I finally manage.
‘Don’t sound so surprised. I’m a nice person.’
‘So you’d have everyone believe,’ I reply, opening the packet of nuts and pouring them directly into my gob. Ah, that’s better. My stomach stops wailing as the plane comes in to land.
‘You’re welcome,’ says Callum.
‘You just can’t help yourself, can you? Always got to have the last word.’
Callum motions zipping his mouth shut and throwing away the key. I beam at him. ‘Much better,’ I say. ‘Some peace at last.’
My body clock is shot to shit but the adrenaline kicks in as the plane roars to a halt on the tarmac. We are finally here! On a personal note, I’m hoping for sightings of the holy Australian trinity also known as Margot Robbie, Nicole Kidman and koalas. No doubtall three will be roaming around the city of Perth at the exact same time I am. I’m also very keen to visit all the Aesop shops and see if the birthplace of fancy soap offers up some slightly less expensive hand creams. Because if so, my heavy suitcase will only be getting heavier for the return journey.
I cast my mind back to the grumpy check-in operative at Heathrow … yesterday morning? It seems like a lifetime ago. Halcyon days, in many ways, as I was unaware that Callum Bang would be blowing in like a storm cloud. A lot seems to have happened over the past day, I think as we start to disembark. I look around, trying to find Hamish and eventually spotting him on the other side of the plane, still seated and letting other people get off before him.
