Rachel snorted. ‘I don’t believe that for one second. Lucas is your typical smoldering hero. He’s very deep so that means he doesn’t always show what he’s thinking on the surface. Instead, he’ll try to bury it inside.’
Willow had to fight a laugh but instead tried to focus on packing her bag. ‘A smoldering hero? Seriously. That’s what you’ve cast him as.’
‘Yeah,’ Rachel said, scanning the last of Willow’s items. ‘And you’re the girl back in town. His old flame. The one who caused hurt before.’
Willow had been fishing in her purse for change, but she froze at Rachel’s words. ‘Old flame? Caused hurt? What are you talking about? We were never like that.’
Rachel’s hand flew to her mouth. ‘Oh, I’ve said too much. Ignore me. I’m a writer. I get carried away in daydreams.’
‘Do you even know Lucas that well?’
‘Sure. He’s a good friend now. We hang out. But he hasn’t said anything to me about you – why would he? I just like imagining things, that’s all.’
Her words felt rushed and as Willow paid her, she felt like something was off, like it had shifted between them. She wished she could remember Rachel better from school; all Willow knew was that Rachel was older and had hung out on her own quite a lot.
‘There was never anything between me and Lucas,’ Willow said finally as she gathered her stuff to leave. ‘Just to clear that up. We were friends once, but then we kind of grew apart.’
‘That’s a shame,’ said Rachel quietly, closing her cash register. ‘He is deep though, that much is true, and he does keep things hidden. It won’t be easy for him – all this.’
‘All what?’
‘You.’ Rachel laughed. ‘Setting up a matcha van outside his diner, acting like a direct competitor, like there is nothing wrong between you. You just need to be mindful that he’s not this big, aloof man that he appears to be. He has feelings. He worries—’
‘I’ll bear that in mind,’ Willow assured her as she left with a stiff smile, not sure if she had been gently advised or completely put in her place.
Either way, it was unsettling.
Later, as Willow curled up on a chair in the cabin, she was relieved to hear the comfort of Jake’s deep, calm voice, but also conflicted – they had stuff that they needed to figure out and she could only avoid it for so long.
She was wrapped up in one of Jenn’s massive wool sweaters as the cool evening breeze seemed to bleed through every nook and cranny.
‘Hi,’ she said softly.
‘Hey,’ he replied. ‘I can’t be long. I’m heading out soon. I promised the guys I’d meet them for a drink.’
‘Oh, OK …’
Willow tried her best to disguise her disappointment. She didn’t want Jake to think she was weak or clingy but at the same time it was difficult not to feel a little bit sad that Jake seemed so happy with this new arrangement. Willow swallowed down her bitterness and quickly tried to recenter herself. This wasn’t part of her new healthy lifestyle and it wasn’t Jake’s fault that she had made this decision. She had to be rational. He had always been outgoing and sociable; this was probably his way of dealing with things.
‘Will Alex be there tonight?’ she asked carefully.
There was a pause. It was enough to make the heavy weight shift in Willow’s gut.
‘Jake. Will she be there?’
‘Yeah, maybe. She lives in Seattle, so I’m guessing she might come by.’
‘You guys are hanging out a lot.’
‘Is that a problem?’ Jake’s voice was cool. ‘Will. Are you jealous?’
Willow considered this for a moment. Was she? Or was she just worried that Jake wasn’t being straight with her? Something here just wasn’t adding up. She realized with a sudden crashing reality that she didn’t even care if Jake was cheating on her. In some ways, she was hoping for it.
Maybe, it would be a way to bring this messy relationship to an end.
And she was sick of feeling confused and neglected.
‘Jake. I’m wondering if this is working. You and me – I mean, are we still good together?’ She was shocked at how relieved she felt to be confronting it finally.
