“They erase me.”
I stand anyway. The line is worse here. Closer. Breathing on breathing. Rancid breath of the undead that makes me want to gag. Hands twitch, eyes roll, and some idiot licks the wall. I laugh under my breath. “They’re worse than me.”
“Not for long,”he replies as I step forward. One person at a time. As I get closer, I feel eyes on me. Killian watches from thetable. Lucifer stares from his throne, and Jagger—he’s waiting to see if I’ll break. I smile at all three of them, then reach the counter. The nurse doesn’t look at me, she just tells me to “Open,” and I do. Then she hands me the cup and the pill drops onto my tongue. Chalky and bitter.
“Lolli!”Jethro pleads, and I swallow. And just like that—silence. Not real silence. But from him. I spin and look at the boys staring back at me. The world dulls and the noise pulls back a bit. I blink. The cafeteria warps a bit. I don’t like it. I DON’T LIKE IT. My hands start to shake, and the nurse whispers something behind me.
“Good girl.”
I glance over my shoulder and smile at her as my feet start to carry me across the room. My mind feels empty, my body feels light. Eyes are still on me. All three of them are still watching. I turn and see Axel’s head tilted. His face is riddled with concern.Why is everyone staring? Are they all waiting? Was this some sort of staged plan?My head tilts as my body feels like it’s floating across the tables. “Jethro?” I whisper, but nothing answers, and my smile falters, cracking at the edges. The room suddenly feels too big, too loud—too real. I’m alone—he was right… they took him from me.
And somewhere deep in my chest something starts scratching to come back out. Jethro.
Giggling Maniac
Lucifer Davenport
Lolli, my little giggle goddess doesn’t look so hot right now.
“But here you are…”
“Our beautiful boy.”
“Look at everyone watching you.”
I smile. Of course they are. I mean, look at me.
“We are.”
“We can never stop.”
“Our own personal God.”
My smile deepens and goosebumps litter my skin the more they go on. Everyone can pretend this room doesn’t bend at my will. They can pretend they don’t stare, but I know the truth. The noise becomes fractured which makes the room manageable. I’m in control.
“You are control.”
“You are what everyone wants.”
“Everything they fear.”
“Yes,” I mutter under my breath. Lolli’s giggle is silent, and all of a sudden everything seems wrong. She swallowed thepills. Shit! I see the change almost immediately. The way her shoulders drop just a fraction too far as she stands by the med counter, head tilted like she’s trying to listen to something that isn’t there. Her smile—it's there but empty. Why did the meds hit so fast? It always takes a bit of time, but fuck… this shit hit her instantly.
“She’s broken now, less interesting.”
“No,” I whisper as I lean back in my chair watching. The crack, the absence. She’s not broken. The meds took her, and I don’t like it. This is theft. My fingers tap once against the table slowly. I’ve seen this before not too long ago.
Standing in a room filled with people who want something. Attention. Control. Permission. And I’m the man they come to. I don’t give them what they want with words. Not at first. Just my presence gives them life. A smile here, a look there. A pause that makes them lean in closer than they should, trusting everything when they shouldn’t have. That’s the difference. They trusted what they wanted me to be. A girl in a red dress was crying, pleading that she didn’t mean it that she didn’t want to follow through. I listen and tilt my head, smiling softly. “You don’t have to,” I tell her, and she instantly relaxes with relief. But later… when she stepped forward—when she chose it… They blamed me.
A tray clatters somewhere across the room taking me out of the memory I don’t like reliving. Two orderlies move in on her, which has my hand curling around the edge of the table. Jagger’s fists tighten and he stands while Killian watches, waiting to see what is going to happen.
“Time to go,” one of them says, already reaching for her. Her hand twitches slowly as she whispers something
“…Jethro?” I see her mouth with wide eyes. I don’t know who Jethro is. I haven’t even been here a full twenty four hoursand what I have noticed is she is alone and speaks to herself. I wonder if she’s like me?
“Take her,” the orderly instructs. “She’ll be prettier quiet.”
My head shakes before my brain computes what to do.
