“Because I’m going to be busy just as soon as this man gets off the clock.”
Fox tilted his face up, and the bartender swooped in to kiss him. Their tongues pushed into one another’s mouths lewdly, and I turned away, unsettled.
Not because it was two guys kissing. I was cool with everyone embracing their sexuality. But because Jamie had flitted through my mind, looking up at me through his lashes as he’d done on that first date that went wrong, and I’d wondered,what if I’d kissed him?
It wasn’t a question I’d ever asked myself about a guy before.
Fox pushed my glass in front of me. “Come on, you sad sack. Drink up and tell me what’s got you all twisted.”
I picked up my glass and gulped the too-sweet liquid.
“You want to experiment with a guy?” Fox asked. “There’s plenty of hot twinks that would love to give you a taste.”
I choked on my swallow, coughing harshly as Fox smacked my back.
“No,” I croaked.
“Well, something is going on.”
“Not any of these guys,” I rasped.
“Okay, now we’re getting somewhere.” Fox stared at me while I fidgeted. “What guy would you want toexperiment with?”
“I don’t want to experiment,” I said harshly. “That wouldn’t be fair to him.”
Fox leaned back, eyes widening. “Oh shit, you’ve got it bad for someone. This is about more than sex, huh?”
“It’s not about sex at all.” I grimaced. “I mean, I don’t know if it is? I’ve never had an interest like that before. I’m thirty-three. I’ve always been straight. This whole thing is stupid. I should just go home.”
Fox considered me for a minute. “You could have gone clubbing with me in Omaha. Gone to a straight bar. Picked up a woman.”
I grimaced. That sounded about as appealing as shaving a poodle. And that was saying something.
I was good at picking up women, but the sex was so empty, and the morning after so awkward that I usually ended up asking them out on a date, whether it was a good idea or not. I mean, fuck, that’s how I’d ended up in the most drama-filled relationship of my life. Just conflict and yelling and screaming. We were completely wrong for each other.
I didn’t want that ever again. That’s why I’d let the Matchmaking Mamas set me up in the first place. Of course, they’d set me up with a guy and it’d seemed like the worst mistake at the time, but now, I couldn’t imaginenotknowing Jamie.
“I don’t want to hook up with some woman. My head is a mess right now. What would be the point?”
Fox shrugged. “That’s just what most straight guys doubting their sexuality would do. Go confirm they like pussy.”
“Charming,” I said dryly.
“But not you. You wanted to come here, to a gay bar, instead. I think you’re looking for a differentanswer.”
I gulped my drink, letting the alcohol numb me as I asked, “What answer would that be?”
“You want to know if you can be with this guy. James, you said his name was?”
My heart lurched. “Jamie.”
“Jamie, right. So Jamie is out on a date, and you’re all up in your feels about it, right?”
“Maybe.” I sighed. “It’s silly. I should be happy for him.”
“Probably,” Fox said, sounding unsympathetic. “But you’re not because you’re jealous.”
I huffed. “I never said that.”
