Shitty Ritchie crawled up my body and settled himself on my shoulder. He leaned in and whispered in my ear. “If Cheese Dick gets close enough, there’s a chance Shitty Ritchie can eat It.”
I nodded without saying anything. It was a long shot, but I’d take any shot we could get. Hell, given the chance, I’d even be willing to take a crack at eating Cheese Dick. I was pretty sure any of us would go for it right now. The thought was repulsive, but dying in cage without saving my daughter was far worse.
“I must straighten up a bit,” Chamuel announced with a laugh that was shrill and lacked any humor whatsoever. “Terrible to murder people in a messy house! Just won’t do. No, it will not do. No, no, no, NO.”
“Names have power, right?” Jennifer whispered as Chamuel paced the cave in fury and agitation. It was so busy dusting the bone pyramids, It seemed to have forgotten we were here.
That wasn’t a bad thing. It gave us a little more time to plan. Plan what? I had no idea…
“Yes, names have power,” I replied. “I don’t know how much, but Goober said they did.”
“That fucker would know,” Candy muttered. “You think you can kill Cheese Dick, Jennifer?”
Jennifer didn’t answer at first. When she finally did, I gulped and started to make peace with the fact that we were all about to bite it.
“I don’t have to kill It,” she said softly. “I simply have to love It.”
“I repeat,” Candy Vargo said. “We’re fucked.”
“Shitty Ritchie is feeling pukey,” he grunted with a gag.
I quickly took the little freak off of my shoulder and set him on the ground. I would not go down without a fight. But I definitely didn’t want to go down covered in vomit.
Tim took Jennifer’s hands then pressed his forehead to hers. “I believe in you, child of mine. You’re blessed with more than I, or anyone here, could imagine. Follow your heart. Your compassion is the key to your power. I love you to the moon and back.”
She kissed his cheek and smiled at her BFF who had miraculously turned out to be her father. Life could be so beautifully strange. I just hoped we got a lot more life to live—both strange and beautiful.
At this point, it was very much up in the air.
Candy Vargo was stressed to the max. Forget about the toothpicks. She had the cardboard box in her mouth. Shitty Ritchie was a greenish hue and drooling. Tim was serene. It was clear he had full confidence in his daughter. Gideon was emotionless and still—looked like a predator about to pounce. He clocked every move Chamuel made. I didn’t know what I was. My body went from hot to icy cold. My stomach was woozy and my brain raced.
“If we could get Chamuel to open the cage, we might have a chance,” I whispered, feeling frantic. “I’m so freaking wound up, I’m pretty sure I could rip Its head off with my bare hands. Don’t you guys think It will open the cage to murder us?”
Jennifer touched my shoulder. A feeling of calm immediately washed over me.
She smiled. “There won’t be any need for that, Daisy. Trust me, girlfriend. I swear it on my silicone knockers.” Her words were vintage Jennifer, but there was something very unusual about the delivery. Just like Shitty Ritchie, she was different than she used to be.
I stared at her in amazement. Jennifer, my Botox loving buddy, the gal who had a cocktail at noon because it was five o’clock somewhere was far more than I’d ever imagined. Her eyes held wisdom beyond her years. Her voice was steady and sure. Her body was relaxed and open to possibilities.
Candy stared as well. “Maybe, we’re not fucked. I’ll bet five bucks that we’re not gonna be pushin’ up any grass today.”
“Only five bucks?” Jennifer inquired with a chuckle and a raised brow.
Her double dose of Botox had finally worn off.
Candy Vargo blanched. “Fuck. I said that out loud?”
“You did,” I confirmed.
“Fine. I’m gonna amend that amount to five million. Better?” she asked Jennifer.
“Much,” Jennifer replied with a grin then turned all business. “Everyone back away from me,” she instructed. “No one will come to my aid. No matter what happens, I’m gonna handle it. There are five-million buckaroos on the line.” She winked at Candy.
Candy winked back.
“Okay,” I said, still feeling a little unsure but backed up as requested.
All five of us—Gideon, Tim, Candy Vargo, Shitty Ritchie and I pressed our ourselves against the back of the cage and waited. I was relieved that the bars didn’t shock the crap out of us.
