“No,” Gideon assured her. “No pain.”
“Good.” She inhaled deeply and blew it out on a raspberry. “How are we going to get him home? I saw his cruiser out there.”
“Not a problem,” Heather told her. “I’ll magically transport both Dip and his sedan back to his house. Gideon can plant a seed in his mind that he’s feeling under the weather and he’ll believe he took the day off of work.”
Jennifer nodded. “Sounds like a plan.” She caressed Dip’s cheek, her eyes damp with emotion. “Dip Doody, I loved you too much to get hitched, and I love you too much to watch you die for me. It’s more than I’ve loved any man in my entire dang life. And…” she said as her voice grew softer. “I love you enough to let you go. I love you enough to protect you like you tried to protect me. And I want you to know this… I promise you that I’ll watchLittle House on the Prairieevery single time there’s a marathon.”
After one more kiss to Dip’s lips, she backed away. “Gideon, do it, please.”
Gideon granted her request. Placing his hands on either side of Dip’s head, the Grim Reaper chanted in a language that was becoming more familiar to me. I still didn’t understand the individual words, but the melodic cadence was riveting and strangely comforting. Shimmering blood-red magic filled the room and landed on every surface. The air grew warmer, and a small smile pulled at Dip Doody’s lips. Jennifer cried the entire time. Actually, there wasn’t a dry eye in the house.
When he was done, Gideon motioned to Heather. She nodded once to him and once to Jennifer. Jennifer gave her a bittersweet thumbs-up.
Without another word, Dip Doody, his cruiser and Heather disappeared in a blast of iridescent purple mist.
Heather would be back. Dip would not.
The silence in the great room was the heaviest it had ever been. Jennifer stared at the ceiling and we all stared at her. After ten full minutes, she walked over to the bar, opened a bottle of wine and drank right from the bottle. She down a full third of the liquid before she came up for air.
With a loud burp and a surprise laugh, she addressed us. “Alrighty, here’s the deal. I’m sad. I’m gonna be sad for a long time, but I also have the priceless gift of knowing I did the right thing by Dip Doody. It would be an entirely different situation if we were all standing here at his funeral because he died for me. That’s something I couldn’t live with. Do all of you feel me?” She quickly held up her hand and gave Shitty Ritchie the eyeball. “Don’t go there, little guy. I ain’t in the mood to slap you silly.”
Shitty Ritchie, to his credit, didn’t go there. He just blew her a kiss.
“So,” Jennifer continued. “I don’t want nobody feeling sorry for me. I want you to be proud of me. Proud for loving someone hard enough to give them up. I thought I’d live out the rest of my days in sin with that beautiful man, but I also thought I’d die at forty-one. A phone psychic once told me that about thirty years ago. She also told me to marry my second husband and that he was a fine and upstanding man. That son-of-a-bitch cheated on me the whole time we were hitched. That psychic was full of shit. It was a total waste of ten dollars and seventy-five cents. I’d like to recommend that no one gets advice from Dial-A-Genie.”
“Good to know!” Shitty Ritchie said. “Thank you.”
“Welcome,” Jennifer said with a chuckle. “Back to business. Heck, at the rate we’re getting attacked, there ain’t no guarantee that we’ll see tomorrow. Can’t take even a second for granted. Iknow I did right today. And I’m gonna keep on doin’ right until I can’t anymore. I’d suggest we all do the same.”
Shitty Ritchie raised his hand. “Does there happen to be a manual on what’s right and what is wrong? Preferably at a second-grade reading level.”
“Shitty Ritchie,” I said. “Cake hole. Shut it.”
“Roger that,” he replied with a grin.
“I’m gonna make a suggestion,” Jennifer announced. “I know it’s kinda spur of the moment, but, like I already said, we’ve got no guarantees for tomorrow.”
“Make that suggestion, girlie!” Gram told her.
“I think I will,” Jennifer replied. “I say we have Gram and Gramps wedding soon. Like right now.”
“But umm,” I said, my nose wrinkling in concern. I’d promised a wedding second to none. We weren’t even done with the planning. “That seems kind of fast.”
“Fast and furious,” Gram sang as she darted around the room like the Tasmanian Devil after ingesting a vat of sugar. “I like it. I don’t need no bells and whistles. All I need is the Mr. Jackson and my family and friends around me to tie the knot.”
“Are you sure?” I asked.
“Positive, Daisy girl,” she promised. “I’m dead. I can’t eat no cake or smell the flowers. All the trappins don’t matter a lick.”
I turned to Jennifer. “Are you really okay with this?” I asked. “Seeing people get married after… well, after what just happened.”
“More than okay,” she said, pouring wine and handing out glasses to everyone present, including the Demon guards. “I’m livin’ in the now. And right now, I wanna see Gram and Mr. Jackson get hitched! It’ll help heal my soul.”
I smiled at my amazing and crazily resilient friend. The mold had been broken when Jennifer was born. She was incredibly special, and I was lucky to call her my friend.
“Then we’re having a wedding!” I announced to cheers from the group. “How about giving us a half hour to get set up?”
Jegguthiz nodded enthusiastically. “I shall take Gram and Gramps back to the dining room and work on the wedding portrait. Call us when the ceremony is to begin.”
