Tai laughs. “Everybody loves you.” His face scrunches in pain. “But nobody loves you like I do. I would never leave you.”
“I know you won’t ever leave. I know you won’t. I’m worried I will.” Tears stream down my face and drop on his torn shirt. My heart is being ripped out of my chest. I touch the side of his face softly. The fact that I love him doesn’t change that I’m too much like my father. Too restless, too selfish.
“Look at you over there, pretending you can live without me,” he says and hisses sharply between his teeth. He grabs at his empty shoulder, writhing in pain.
“It’s nice to see you didn’t lose your sense of humor along with your arm.” I laugh through sobs, wiping tears away with my dirty hand.
“Never,” he says with a painful laugh. “You’re a lot tougher than I thought you would be.”
“I am my father’s daughter,” I say absentmindedly as I check his wounds. These are words I’ve thought often but rarely said out loud.
“No, you’re wrong. You’re like your brothers. Loyal, hardworking, selfless.” He struggles to get each word out, breathing hard between each one.
“I love you.” With those final words, he passes out, his body going limp.
“FUCK!” I scream and run to the flight deck.
I snap myself into the harness, not bothering to tighten the straps.
“Assistance Support System!” I shout into the air.
Nothing.
“Activate Support System!” I try again. What were the fucking words?!
Nothing.
“Advanced Systems…” Oh fuck this.
“ASS, turn on the goddamn engines!”
The freighter chimes, and the control panel lights up green. Halle-fucking-lujah. Green means go.
“Automated Support System, Activated.”
The engines roar to life, and I’m thrown back into my seat. Nausea rolls through my stomach. I do my best to swallow it back down. The freighter lifts off the ground with a swoop, moving faster than I was prepared for. I’m used to the slow movements of a passenger ship—not a freighter that cares nothing for the comfort of the cargo. We break through the thin atmosphere, and the sight of bright stars against a black sky has never looked so good.
“ASS, link to Hycea 34, Aro pt’Burosa,” I instruct the AI system.
“It is preferential to direct the voice activation using the official terminology.”
Not in the mood to be lectured by a fucking machine, I hit the mute on the control panel and search for the comms glyph. The link goes through and a small Aro the size of my forearm takes shape under the holoprojector.
“How do I get this thing home?” I ask Aro, skipping all pleasantries.
“You have no idea how happy I am to see you,” he says with a smile.
“Aro don’t fuck around. I need to get back—now. Tai’s hurt.”
The only thing that matters is getting Tai home. I can’t eat. I can’t sleep. He was restless at the start, constantly tossing and turning, sweating, and mumbling. The last three or four hours he’s been completely still. No movement. I watch his chest slowly rise and fall with his breath, afraid to even blink. The only relief comes from obsessively checking his pulse.
We survived Sabaak together. That’s how this story ends. It hasto. I fell in love with him while he healed from his past. I didn’t know it was possible for someone to change so drastically. All those limiting beliefs fell away right before my eyes. It made me confront some of my own thoughts that hold me back.
I’ve put myself in the same category as my father my whole life. But Tai is right. I’m like the rest of my family as well. I’m not just one thing.
It took incredible strength to hold himself accountable for what happened here all those years ago. I’ve never admired someone more.
For too long, I’ve viewed my strong personality and outspoken nature as a liability. I’ve felt the energy from those around me, on edge, waiting for me to say or do the wrong thing. I never got that feeling from Tai. It’s like he wanted me to step into my strength and not apologize for anything.
