Darius:you touched him??
Lex:friendly like!! a pat!! a companionable pat!! the boxers do it all the time!! it’s positive reinforcement!!
Mick:the way you people carry on in that gym is not normal
Lex:ANYWAY he’s god tier. hundred points. guaranteed win if you bag him. no one else is going to get near him because of his murder gaze. would be proper terrifying if it didn’t look like he’d splashed ninety quid on lash extensions. I’m adding modifiers
Darius:what modifiers he’s got no medals and no deals
Lex:CUSTOM MODIFIERS
Lex:+10 for being so posh he has a hyphenated surname that no one can pronounce
Lex:+5 for owning a trunk that weighs more than me
Lex:+5 for the fact that his sport requires him to wear WHITE BREECHES in public which is an act of sexual warfare that should be prosecuted at The Hague
Mick:white breeches??
Lex:TIGHT white breeches, Mick. I’ll send evidence when I have it. the man’s going to be walking around this village in jodhpurs and tall boots like he’s wandered out of a BBC period drama and I am SUPPOSED to just be NORMAL about it??
Darius:hundred points then
Lex:hundred points
Mick:orientation?
Lex paused. He looked at the ceiling. The Village accommodation was functional and impersonal. Just compact rooms with single beds, thin walls, and a view of a courtyard that smelt faintly of chlorine from the pool next door. He could hear someone’s music through the wall.
Lex:ambiguous
Darius:ambiguous how
Lex:ambiguous like I don’t know. he could be gay. he could be straight and just very uptight. he could be one of those boarding school lads who had a fumble with the head boy and now can’t make eye contact with men under fluorescent lighting
Mick:so you’re chasing a man who might be straight
Lex:I’m not CHASING anyone. I’m NOMINATING him for the tier list. different thing entirely. this is administrative
Darius:you’re chasing him
Lex:I’m conducting a strategic assessment
Mick:lol
Lex:ANYWAY he goes in at male (ambiguous) and the hundred stands. all in favour?
Darius:aye
Mick:wait
Mick:Lex
Mick:is your marquess blond
Lex:yeah why
Mick:posh blond? skinny? looks like he’s never been warm in his life? never been hugged
