Ellie
All summer, Madisonand I share a room, as we usually did whenever I was home for break. By the end of the season, however, it’s never been more painfully clear that we aren’t the closest of sisters. What’s worse is that nearly every conversation of ours devolves into ceaseless bickering.
“What’s Amber High like?” I ask, sitting cross-legged on the thin folding mattress that’s my bed until Madison vacates hers. She ignores my question in the midst of her indecision about which five jackets she wants to bring to college, even though she’ll be visiting home long before the weather calls for that many options.
Madison says something as she walks into the closet.
“What?” I ask.
She ducks her head back out to repeat, “I don’t know; it was just like a normal high school.”
“That’s super helpful, thanks.”
With a small shake of her head, Madison adds, “Well, I guess you’ve never actually been to anormalschool before, so I don’t know what to tell you.”
I roll my eyes and nod toward the pile of winter coats. “Just take one for now…You can swap them out later.”
“Oh, that works.”
“Mom will make you take—”
“—take a scarf anyway,” Madison says, finishing my thought. We share a knowing look.
Then a noxious smell fills the air. “Ew, your roommate is not going to appreciate that.”
“It wasn’t me!” She bends down and scoops up Cheese, dropping him into my lap. “Take care of my baby. Make sure you feed him.”
“He’s notyourcat.” I cross my arms. “Of course I’ll feed him. Why wouldn’t I feed him?”
When we first moved into this house, there was a Post-it Note on the back door that saidCheese makes him gassy. We had no idea what it was about until this fat long-haired black cat showed up in our backyard later that evening. I was the one who hid him inside for a week before anyone found out. My parents weren’t thrilled at first but came around to him eventually, as long as we both promised to take care of him. Madison and I were equally obsessed, and it broke my heart to be away from him while I was at Brandview. But now that I’m back, I’m never leaving this cat ever again.
Madison finishes packing, and I follow as she lugs her suitcases downstairs, where our parents are waiting. They make us take a picture together to commemorate the occasion. Madison’s starting at Indiana University. It’s hard not to be jealous that she’s the one who gets to leave this fall, while I’m stuck here. At least I get the house to myself the weekend before starting at the new high school.
“Okay, now one with just Madison,” Mom calls out, motioning for me to step aside.Story of my life.
Dad is quick to explain when he sees my expression sour. “We’ll get one of you on your first day at Amber. Don’t you worry, Ellie-door.”
Yeah, when I was little, I couldn’t hear my name correctly and pronouncedEleanorasEledor, which spurred this oh-so-hilarious nickname my father won’t drop.
Mom says something to me about “emergency numbers on the fridge,” but I don’t ask her to repeat. It’s not like I’m going to call anyone anyway.
“I’m glad we got to spend time together this summer before I left,” Madison says, pulling me into a hug.
“Yeah, me too.” We did have our nice moments, however sparse.
“Aww, well,good luckat Amber.”
Just like that, something about her infantilizing tone sets me off. She constantly belittles and treats me like I’m significantly younger than her even though we’re only a year apart. You can’t tell me that my parents raising us as “the perfect one” and “the disabled one” has nothing to do with this dynamic.
“Youalwaysdo that,” I snap.
Madison sighs dismissively. “Stop getting upset over nothing. I can’t say good luck? Whatever.”
“Now, girls—” But the rest of what Dad says is drowned out by the roll of suitcases clunking down the two front steps toward the driveway.
I give a curt wave before locking the front door behind them, then go upstairs to the bedroom that’s supposedly mine now but still feels temporary. Madison left her movie posters on the wall and plants dangling on the window sill. It’s all hers, every decoration in here.
Clearing off the desk, I shove the clutter in with the rest of her stuff in the closet so I can place a few items of my own, finally trying to settle in as best I can. The nameplate I brought home from Brandview. A stuffed octopus Cody won for me at a summer fair. The sweater I knit him, which he kept sneaking back into my bag whenever I visited this summer. I want him to accept the gift already, but he seems to think he’s turned this into some silly game of giving it back to me. I still need to print out photographs, since the smiling faces on the wall staring back at me are Madison and her friends.
