Ka-Bar cleared his throat. “Know I’m not part of the group, but I’ll play. I lost my blood family long ago. I was left with Kai. Kubrick,” he corrected. “She’s all the family I ever needed. However, my son will be the start of a new generation, and a new bloodline. Whatever time I have with my sister and my son is good enough for me.”
TB was next. There was a tightness to his voice when he said, “If I had to choose between the two, I’d have to give up either my son, my flesh and blood, or the daughter we chose to love. I could never make that choice. Every time I leave Axel and Paris, it destroys me because I wonder if that’s the last time I’ll see them. I don’t ever want them to know the pain I felt at losing a parent.” He cleared his throat. “But every time we win, I get to come back home to them. To my kids. There’s nothing better than that. That makes it better. I want forever with both. And Flame, of course.”
Nemo looked out into nothing, a devilish smile on his face. “Allmy life, I was a fuckup. Sometimes on purpose, sometimes not. I couldn’t wait to get older. For things to get easier. Fuck of it is, the older I got, the harder things got. Suddenly, I had to make choices I never wanted to make. I gained wealth, but I lost my freedom. I found my calling, but I had to lose my found family to respond. I gained the best life partner a man could ever want, but I had to lose a brother to do it.”
Midas threw a squishy cat at him, hitting him in the chest. “You didn’t lose me. We just cut the cord, is all.”
Nemo threw the cat back, a smile on his face.
“I already feel like I’ve achieved immortality. I’ve lived too many lives when I should have lost all of them,” Demon said. “When I hit rock bottom, that should have been the end. Instead, I cheated death so many times, I think I stole lives from cats. Tribe saved my life. Literally. The saying goes that hindsight is twenty-twenty. I’d like to think I would have made the same choice at any point in my life if it were offered to me. The beginning is written, and so is the end. It’s the middle that changes because we make choices. As much as I love you all, I’m good with a finite end when the time comes.”
“Me too,” Midas agreed. “Almost dying will do that to you, I think. People probably expect it would be the opposite, but I’m not afraid of it anymore. Mouse, me, our two girls, you guys and your families. Whatever time we all have together is what we’re supposed to have. I wouldn’t want it any other way.”
They all looked at Steel.
“It was your choice to break the rules, Steel,” Nemo reminded him. “What’s your answer?”
He sat there, thoughtfully, looking out the window at the rooftops. He didn’t really have an answer. Not a solid one.
“I guess…” He stopped, then tried again. “My family was… is… the worst of the worst. When people didn’t play by their rules, they destroyed them. I’d like to think that Tobias would have seen the truth when he got older, but… I’ll never know. You all might think I’m awful for saying this, but while I miss Tobias as if I’m missing a part of me, Iprefer that he was taken from me rather than have my family get their hooks into him. The finite number of years I had with him when he still loved me as purely as a son can love a father? That’s how I want to remember him. That the years we had were good. Not tainted by evil.”
A chorus of “Amen” washed through the seating area.
One by one, the men all drifted away to go about their daily business, but Steel stood there watching the monitor. At some point, even Midas left when he noticed his teammate’s center of focus. The sight of Daleyza holding the baby was giving him pangs. He wanted them under control before he went downstairs and saw her, but so far, they just seemed to get worse. No, not worse. Stronger.
“She looks like she made a beautiful mother,” Ka-Bar said from behind him.
“She did,” he replied softly. He turned to his friend. “Ka-Bar—” he false-started. “Kent.” He held out his hand. “Thank you. For everything you did for Daleyza and me. We never had a chance to tell you.”
“No thanks needed. You came and pulled me out of that shithole in Bariloche. You protected my wife and my son. I wish I could have?—”
“Stop. You better not be blaming yourself for Tobias. That’s no one’s fault but the man who pulled the trigger. I’ll never know which of my family it was. It doesn’t matter, really. But they are the ones who should pay for the act.”
Ka-Bar’s eyes burned with a fire of righteous anger. “Their day is coming, Steel. They don’t get to do what they did to him, to you, to anyone, and not pay for their crimes.”
Steel nodded and glanced back at his wife with Paris.Mierda, they made a pretty picture.
36
SEPTEMBER 6, 2024
Daleyza
Lunch had been a bit overwhelming,to say the least. This much female companionship in the same room was still awkward for her, but she was trying. These women, children, and even the dogs meant a lot to Ildefanso, so while it would have been easier and more comfortable to hide upstairs in their apartment, she was trying. For him.
When Scheherazade had jumped on Flame, she quickly, and without thinking, handed over baby Paris to Daleyza. In the ensuing chaos, the woman hadn’t taken the child back. At first, she stood there stunned. Frozen in place.
Instead of the pain she expected, all she felt was warmth. At first, that frightened her. While she’d run the day care from her home, children had been part of her life since Tobias’ death, but she’d somehow managed to wall off any emotions toward them. She took care of them, fed them, and played with them. But she hadn’t loved them.With time, they made her feel closer to her son, but she still refused to let them in. That way, when their parents no longer needed her services, she didn’t feel the pain of their leaving.
When the fear passed, she moved on to anger. She felt herself locking her body, working hard to control her breathing, as the rage built within her. Why her son? Why did these women get to have children with their partners who craved danger, while she was denied? She glared at the child’s innocent, sleeping face.
Then, all of a sudden, the rage was gone. This poor, innocent child had been through hell. A hell she hopefully would remember nothing of, but she’d heard the women’s stories about how the children came to them and how they had come to be in the life of the deadmen. Warmth flooded her, and a sense of contentment she hadn’t felt in a long time.
All through lunch, she’d held the baby. All through the children playing, the dogs running around, and the women reading the ridiculously hot book Flame had brought with her. It had been close to two hours, but until this child turned fussy and wanted her mother, Daleyza was going to sit there and soak it in.
The conference room door opened, and a cheer came up from the kids as Steel loped into the room. He greeted each one with high fives, pet each of the dogs, and greeted each of the women with a kiss to the cheek before finally coming to her side.
When she caught his full attention, she hurriedly looked down at the baby in her arms. She jumped up from her seat, but before she could hand the little girl back to Flame, Steel swept forward and plucked the child right out of her arms, laying her sleepy head on his shoulder and rocking back and forth on his feet.
