Lord I am a weak woman folding for food, but goddamn it, this is amazing. Bella laughs from beside me, earning her a glare, but doesn’t back down.
“Take a bite then laugh at me,” I mumble, watching as she does and her eyes widen. Cayden asks something from beside me, but I’m more focused on clearing the plate in front of me to care.
When the plates are cleared and the chatter begins again, I notice Cayden’s eyes are still on me. I don’t think he’s looked away for more than a second since I’ve sat down. His lips curve into a smirk as his eyes glance on my every detail.
“See something you like?”
His smirk grows as he rests his head against his palm. “Absolutely.”
For a moment, I feel my heart skip a beat, an unfamiliar feeling building in my chest before I force it back down again. Before I can stop it, a smirk lines my lips that I quickly wipe away. He’s a target, that’s all he is. He’s just manipulating me to feel otherwise. I’ve been trained for this, I can do this.
“So, who are you?” Bella asks, interrupting my internal despair.
“No one important,” Cayden replies dryly. “The better question is, who are you? Do you even know yourselves, or is that not allowed?”
Neither of us respond, momentarily stunned into silence, and I’m not much better. He has a point. We aren’t allowed to know ourselves. Why would they let us do that when they decide everything for us?
“Well, I…” Bella cuts herself off by taking a sip from the champagne glass in front of her. Cayden’s eyes meet mine again when his words ring in my head again. You don’t deserve the life you have. Suddenly they take on a whole new meaning. Does he pity me?
“I see that pretty head working. Tell me what’s on your mind, darling, I’ll never lie to you.” The words feel like a promise, like he means them. I force myself to shut off, suppressing everything my body is trying to feel with what I know. Cayden is a target, and just like all the others, he’s trying to find a way to cheat death. Only for some reason…it’s working.
“How do you know so much about The Academy?” I ask instead, trying to remember all the answers I wanted before that goddamned dish.
“I have my suspicions. Which your friend, what was her name? Lauren? Confirmed some of them. Others I have been told personally, by people who have been within the walls of what you call the underground. I know you’re dehumanised. I know you’re not allowed to know your names, yet somehow you find a way to anyway, I know you’re trained to be evil, but none of you truly want to be. And I know your friend, Lauren, will be dead if Bella becomes your partner. I know you, Darlia, were taken far too young to live a life this cruel. You may think I am the villain, but you don’t second guess the four walls you call home.”
I’m physically unable to speak. I open my mouth to try, but no words come out. Bella spits out her champagne at the use of her name, something she did not tell him, nor did I.
“How the fuck do you know my name?”
The table is silent, so silent. Cayden doesn’t say a word. Marcus is looking anywhere but at me, and Bella is still staring at Cayden in shock. The only reminder we’re not alone is the sound of the other guests either side of us.
“How the fuck do you know my name?” Bella repeats, her gaze is cold. I now know this is seconds away from escalating to a point where we all die.
“Bella,” I warn, watching as her eyes snap to me, but she does take a breath.
“You’re much too tense, your name is not something to hide. In fact, I know all ninety-nine names: Kaitlin, Jacinda, Brooke, Danika, Shayleen–”
I cut him off before he can say any more, shaking my head. “It’s seventy-six now.”
I don’t mean to tell him, I know telling him is bad. But he thinks he knows everything when he couldn’t be further from the truth. I know almost every single name, I met every girl, and I knew the ones that died. That is not something he will ever know. That is not a pain he will ever know.
Cayden didn’t hold them while they died, telling them they would be okay. He doesn’t know. “You have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“No?” He smiles, his face turning to me with confidence that only makes me angrier. “So you’re not worried you’ll get the chair for talking to me? What was it you were told…Do not engage me? Yet here you are, talking to me. How very rebellious of you, darling.”
“I am not your darling!” Seething, my voice raises louder than I want to, drawing unnecessary attention. I pause, forcing myself to take a breath, I cannot afford to create a scene right now. Cayden knows about the chair, he knows about Shayleen, he knows far too much.
He needs to die, and I need to be the one to do it. But first I need to figure out exactly how much he knows.
“How do you know so much about The Academy?”
“Sources.”
“Who’s telling you?”
“You look beautiful in red,” Cayden says, evading my question. His eyes light up as if he’s enjoying my torment, enjoying giving me nothing. But I always find a way to get the answers I want, something I’m sure he’s aware of. He wants a reaction that I refuse to give him.
“You’re asking the wrong questions, love.”
