As I force my body to relax into his, and try to get his guard down, I think back on my life and how the hell Iarrived to be here at this very moment; trapped in a concrete box without windows, and sheets hung around, blocking the rest of the room. I’ve tried to be the person my father raised me to be. I tried to be nice to Phil, even after everything that happened. I trapped all that shit inside in an effort to forget about it. But he won’t let me. He wants me to remember. He wants me to drown in my fear.
I wonder what my father would think about me now, captured in the arms of a drug dealer who seems to think I belong to him. Would he blame me? I’ve done everything my father asked me to do, and yet, here I am. Trapped in this nightmare. A lone tear drips from the corner of my eye, and I wipe my face against the rough pillow to erase any evidence of it. No, my father would tell me to stay strong and fight back, not to let this asshole, who doesn’t deserve the air he breathes, to control me.
Would Cash tell me to fight, or would he want me to wait for him to find me and not put myself in further danger? An image of Cash on his knees kissing away my pain and silently pledging his love flashes in my mind. The thought of him finding me dead scares me. I’ve put that man through so much since we’ve met, and forced him to let me in. Now that he has, I don’t know what my death would do to him. I don’t want him to go through that. I don’t want Cady to go through it again. Cash and I deserve a chance. We’ve both fought against ourselves so hard for it.
The pressure in the room changes, and the sheets billow just enough to see light shiningin from a door through the gaps. Someone walks toward one of the tables and lays something down. The door is still open, but closing slowly on its own, blocking out the sunlight. My gut instinct says wait for a better time, but my head is screaming it’s now or never. I could die here at the hands of this monster and whoever just entered. I’m not giving up. No fucking way am I dying here. I still have reasons to live.
I slam my head back against his face as hard as I can, forgetting the injury to my head. My skull feels like it splits in two as a blinding pain tears through it behind my eyes. His arms loosen on contact. Although I’m in severe pain and seeing double vision, I throw myself off the cot in the direction of the door.
A gargled shout sounds behind me right before something collides with my back. My head is ripped back by my hair, but it doesn’t hurt near as bad as the pain ricocheting in my head and the now present stabbing in my ribs.
Did I just sign my own death certificate?
My body hits the cot, knocking the wind out of me. At this point, if he’s going to kill me, I’d give anything to be put out of my misery quickly and not suffer more at his hands, but that’s not how he operates. No, he will take his precious time, making sure eachlovinginfliction won’t kill me until he’s ready. Phil straddles my waist and holds my hands above my head, blood dripping from his nose onto my face.
“I tried to play nice, Hazel, I really did,” he grits through his teeth as he struggles with me. “Hold her down.”
“No!” I turn my head to see who he’s talking to, but he covers my face with the pillow. The next thing I feel is a cold trickle in my vein before it turns warm and feels like hellfire working its way through my body. My limbs grow numb and lay limp at my sides before my lids get heavy.
“Relax, baby,” he croons as he combs my hair out of my face. “It’s only gonna get better from here.”
Thatis what I’m afraid of.
CHAPTER 11
CADY
THISshit is too surreal for me to comprehend. It’s been days since Hazel disappeared, and I am no closer to finding an answer. I think Bobby has one, though. He’s just not sharing it with us yet. He stayed up after Erick and I laid down for the night, drinking coffee of all things at two in the morning. That’s unlike him. Usually after work he’s exhausted and ready to crash. But last night he was alert, as if he had just gotten up to go to work. My mind churned for hours keeping me awake. I kept hearing him moving around in the living room and finally at six, I got up to see what the fuck he was doing. I caught him sneaking out the front door.
“Where are you going?” I asked suspiciously.
Bobby turned in shock and faced me, putting his hands up as if guarding himself from a blow that wasn’t coming. “I can’t sleep.”
I leaned against the bar and watched for any sign of deception. “Drinking coffee at two in the morning can do that to ya.”
He chuckled tiredly. “Yeah. I was just gonna go for a drive and clear my mind.” He hesitates for a moment, squeezing the doorknob in his grip before continuing. “Thought I would swing by Dustin’s and see if I could catch him there. Maybe get some answers…or something.”
Bobby’s eyes never left mine as he admitted that. Every time Bobby lies, he looks you straight in the eye, as if he’s gauging if you’re buying the bullshit he’s selling. Well, that shit reeked to high heaven. I wasn’t buying it. We stared at each other for a moment before I nodded my head and turned away, biting my tongue.
“I’ll lock the door behind you.”
“Thanks,” he mumbled, then left, closing the door softly behind him.
It’s nine, and he’s still not back. If he were telling the truth, he would’ve returned by now, with some sort of information or nothing. I can barely keep my lids open even with the copious amounts of caffeine I’ve been sucking down.
Erick shuffles into the kitchen and lays his hand on my shoulder. I reach up and squeeze it with my own.
“Hey, babe. You get any sleep?” he asks, rubbing his face.
“No.” I sigh. “Not for lack of trying, though.”
He makes a cup of coffee and takes the seat across from me, sipping the brew. I light a cigarette and use the quiet momentto get all my thoughts together, allowing him to fully wake before presenting them to him. He watches me puff on my cigarette in deep thought but leaves me be. I lean forward and rest my arms on the table, preparing to unleash my thoughts. Once he’s drank the majority of his cup, I jump right in.
“Has Bobby told you anything?”
Erick cocks his head to the side in confusion, then laughs. “Bobby tells me a lot of shit. Of what are you referring to?” He rests his cheek on his fist, his eyes twinkling with laughter.
I just come out with it. No need to beat around the damn bush. “Does he know where Hazel is?”
