“No, it’s not.”
Having feelings for your best friend’s wife had to be hard enough on its own. To carry that guilt as you moved to a new city and started a new life? Erin couldn’t even begin to imagine how difficult it had been for Logan.
“I came back for Jake’s funeral.” He rubbed his hand over his face and closed his eyes. “It was a beautiful service.”
Tears streamed down Erin’s cheeks. It was another heartbreaking detail she wished she’d known sooner. She’d held a grudge against Logan for too long, most of it unwarranted. The emotions of the evening built up inside her until they began to bubble over and become too overwhelming.
Erin did the only thing she could think of. She closed the distance between them and pulled Logan into a hug. He stiffened in her embrace, but after a moment, his arms tightened around her back, and he pulled her close against him. She breathed the familiar woodsy scent of him as she rested her head against his chest and listened to the steady rhythm of his heart. This was different from the time she’d hugged him after the destruction of the wedding cake. There was something more to it, though she was afraid to name what that thing was.
At any rate, this was a wordless way to tell him that she still cared. She hoped he knew his confessions hadn’t sent her running, even if they had caught her off guard.
If Logan wasn’t so set on leaving, Erin could almost imagine life with him back in Frostford. In what capacity, she wasn’t sure. He’d admitted to loving her. Did that mean he still had those feelings for her? Did she have those feelings for him?
She loved Logan, always had, but as a friend. The love he’d admitted to was a completely different ballgame. It was new and scary—and completely unexpected. It would take time for her to sort through what all of this meant and to be able to formulate a thoughtful response.
The sound of coughing broke through the silence of the house. She and Logan broke apart like they were burned by each other’s touch. Erin ran shaky hands down the front of her robe. “I should?—”
“Yeah, I need to ... ” Logan rubbed the back of his neck as his words trailed off.
Their eyes found each other, and she quickly looked away. A nervous laugh escaped her lips. It was hard to know if the embarrassment she felt came from the fact that she was contemplating Logan’s romantic feelings toward her, or that it was at the expense of taking care of her son—her sick son who needed her attention.
“I really should go check on Parker.” She hitched her thumb toward the stairs.
“I know.”
She didn’t move. Instead, she continued to look atLogan as she played with the tie of her robe, twisting the worn fabric in her fingers.
“Go,” Logan said. “I’m not going anywhere.”
Not yet, at least, Erin thought, as she turned to go upstairs toward her bedroom, but he would be leaving. Soon. With that looming deadline also came Erin’s impending eviction.
She reminded herself that Logan was here to sell Aunt Betty’s house. When that happened, she would need a new place to live. Erin needed to start looking at apartments because it didn’t look like she’d have enough to buy this house—not after the wedding cake fiasco. She needed to stop getting distracted by how nice it would be to have Logan around all the time. She needed to put some distance between her and Logan so she didn’t get her heart broken when he left again.
Neither of these things were what she wanted to do, but she didn’t get to choose the difficult circumstances that came into her life. She could only control how she handled them. And Erin resolved to steel herself for the inevitability of losing two things she really wanted but couldn’t have—even if that meant having to get rid of them herself.
Logan pouredthe milk from their glasses down the sink and rested his hands against the counter. He’d done it. He told Erin how he felt about her. It was one of the hardest things he’d ever done, but Erin hadforgiven him. It wasn’t easy, it was messy, and Logan felt like he was more exposed than he’d ever been.
He didn’t regret it, but he also wasn’t sure what he was trying to accomplish.
He turned the water on and started washing the glasses. He made quick work of the small load, and once the dishes were resting in the dish drainer, he looked up at the clock. It was that terrible hour of the morning—too late to go back to sleep, too early to be awake.
There was a faint glow on the horizon as the sun prepared for its ascent. The stars were fading against the dark night sky as the day prepared to break.
Logan stretched his hands over his head. He twisted his back to ease the stiffness, and his eyes caught on the guesthouse through the kitchen window. He hadn’t really given the small building much thought, other than sleeping there. It really wasn’t a bad space. It had a bedroom, and bathroom, and a small kitchenette. Compared to some apartments in the city, it was positively spacious. It would be more than enough for a single man such as himself.
He stilled at the thought. He could not think about moving into the guesthouse. He had a plan, and that plan was to fix up Aunt Betty’s house, sell it, and then bring her with him. It was a good plan.
Of course, nothing had gone according to plan. Instead, Logan had gotten close to Parker and Samantha and had confessed his feelings to Erin.
Logan wiped the cookie crumbs from the counter as he pondered over what to do. He knew that he still loved Erin—loved her so much it hurt—but was that enough for him to break his commitment to his other job? The commitment he’d made to Aunt Betty? He didn’t know. He wasn’t sure Erin felt the same way or if something could ever work between them. Jake and Logan had been friends. Erin was still grieving her late husband’s death, and Logan was thinking about wanting to date her?
No, he would need to stick to the plan before making more of a mess of an already complicated situation.
“You’re up early,” Aunt Betty said, coming up behind him. Logan had forgotten that she was always up before the sun. Her hand settled on his shoulder.
“I was up with Erin,” he said.
Aunt Betty’s brows shot up.
