“Okay. Give me a few days to wrap things up here and I’ll text you. Thanks for letting me know.”
Saskia clicked the ‘end call’ button, tossed her phone onto the bed beside her, and let her head fall to her hands. She didn’t even remember making it to the bed. Her phone had rung while she was making a cup of coffee in Kivi’s kitchen, and over the course of the chat with her brother, her legs had moved without her bidding until she ended up here. Right now, she couldn’t really feel them. Or the rest of her body. Her mum was okay, thank God, but just knowing that she’d been taken to hospital after a car accident…
“She’s just a bit banged up physically, but it’s mentally that she seems to be really struggling,”Leo had said.“I wasn’t even going to tell you until you got back, but she’s really low. Keeps on about how she thought she was never going to see us again, and how she would have died without ever marrying Gilly… it’s shitty stuff to hear from your own mum. I think it would do her good to see you. I know you’ve only got a week and a bit to go, but…”
“No, it’s fine,”Saskia had cut him off.“I’ll come back. I just need a few days here to… well, things are a bit more complicated than I expected here, so I’ll need a few days to sort things out. Can you tell her I’m on my way?”
“No,”Leo said.“It would make her feel worse, knowing that you’ve upended your plans to come back here. Better to present it as a done deal, then she can’t argue.”
“True,”Saskia said, and sighed.“Okay. Give me a few days to wrap things up here and I’ll text you. Thanks for letting me know.”
A door banged in the living room. Kivi was back. “Saskia?” she called.
“In here,” Saskia croaked, and forced herself to stand. Kivi appeared in the doorway, and one look at her sunny expression made Saskia feel like crap that she was about to ruin her mood. Sure enough, Kivi’s face fell, and she rushed to Saskia’s side.
“What happened? Did you collapse? Do you feel dizzy?”
“Mum was in a car accident,” Saskia managed. “On Wednesday night. She’s okay, she’s being discharged from the hospital today, but she’s in bits mentally. I have to go back. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…” She collapsed into sobs, and Kivi guided her back onto the bed.
“Hey, hey,” she murmured, wrapping her into a hug. “It’s okay. You’re okay.”
“I’ve ruined our time together, I’m so sorry. We’ve been so happy, and now I have to go…” Saskia sobbed.
“It’sokay,” Kivi repeated. “You have to be there for your family. And I’ll still be here when you come back. If…”
“If what?”
“I was going to sayifyou come back, but that’s just me being silly.”
“OfcourseI’m going to come back,” Saskia said, and found herself cradling Kivi’s face in her hand, wiping away a tear with her thumb. “I don’t want to go. But I can tell her about us, and about you, and about this, and she’ll be happy. She’ll get better, and she’ll be happy, and then I’ll get ready to come back. I know it.” Her hand dropped, and her fists clenched at her sides, a wave of determination washing over her.
“So… when are you going to go?” Kivi said.
“Tomorrow, I suppose,” Saskia sighed. “It’s a good job I packed up all my stuff to move in here, isn’t it? I still know where everything is.”
“Can’t you stay one more day?” Kivi said. “I have… had plans for tomorrow night. That’s what I came down to tell you. But – I mean, I understand if you don’t want to wait. If you just want to get home and see your mum.”
“Well,” Saskia said, wiping her eyes, “it’s not a life-or-death situation. Thankfully. And I said to Leo that it might take a couple of days to get myself sorted out… so I guess I can wait one more day. What did you have in mind?”
“Oh, just something silly.” Kivi flapped a hand. “Something cheesy and romantic. Again, not life or death.”
“But you were excited about it,” Saskia said. “I could see it in your face. I’m sorry I burst your bubble. I will stay. I’ll go home on Sunday instead. Less traffic, too.”
“Only if you’re sure,” Kivi said, but nuzzled Saskia with her chin, telling her all she needed to know.
. . .
Despite Saskia’s reservations about actual cheese, she didn’t mind it in a romantic sense.
And the sky was certainly adding to the ambience, she mused as she and Kivi walked hand-in-hand towards the steps that led down to the beach. It was dazzling. What had been a blazing, glorious summer’s day had melted into a sultry, shadow-draped evening. The blue had given way to pink, with faint undertones of purple, and the sun itself sat so low in the sky that in half an hour it would be gone completely. Like the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, giving out an ethereal glow. They hadn’t intended to leave it so late to come out, but they hadn’t been able to leave their bed – even after they’d finished, they’d clung to each other, because they knew that letting each other go would be the beginning of the end.
Not that this was the end, Saskia reminded herself sternly. Just a temporary pause. Their relationship was not going anywhere – it was only herself who was going.Temporarily.To pack up her life and move down here permanently. Because there was no way this could be just a fling now. Even after only a couple of weeks, she knew in her gut that this was it for her. Kivi or nothing.
Kivi went ahead when they got to the steps, because they were so narrow that only one person could fit on each one. Well, one person and a dog, but Toto wasn’t with them tonight. They had wanted the evening to be just for them, and much as they loved the big lug, they weren’t prepared to share it, even with him. Saskia watched her as she descended. It wasn’t graceful, what with the bulky bag slung over her shoulder that she’d refused to let Saskia carry, but every step was justKivi.Purposeful. Decisive. Determined. And then, when she got to the bottom, the look she threw over her shoulder was alllove.Concern. Affection. Care. Saskia’s hand bumped hers as they fell into stepbeside each other, and Kivi took it as if she’d been waiting for a sign. She clenched it in a death grip at first, but when Saskia wiggled her fingers she relaxed them.
They didn’t say anything as they walked. They didn’t need to. The beach was practically empty, given that they were further up than most people ventured. That was because most people joined it from the village. Saskia and Kivi hadn’t wanted to bump into anybody they knew, hence their decision to go down the steps.
Saskia was eminently glad that they were on the side of Cornwall that faced west. This meant that the sun set over the sea. The sea itself, in contrast to the gentle dignity of the golden sky, was surprisingly active. Choppy. Much more Saskia than Kivi – almost bubbling with suppressed anxiety, much as she tried to suppress it.
