Iris thanked them all, handed the keys to the shop over to Bonnie, and reminded them that there were some treats for Midas in a bag back at the shop as well as a couple of his favourite chew toys.
Iris left and Faye offered to wait for the takeaway while the others went ahead, but the takeaway arrived as they were pulling on their coats.
‘We’ll need plates,’ said Faye and Bonnie found a few plus cutlery to put into a bag.
Bonnie was going through the motions, trying not to think about the enormity of setting foot inside the bookshop. Howard would want her to do this; he wouldn’t want his bookshop put at unnecessary risk with a door that wouldn’t lock. But that didn’t mean it was going to be easy.
‘Bonnie,’ Faye urged. ‘Come on, let’s go.’
But she couldn’t move. ‘I can’t.’
‘You can,’ said Margot. ‘We’re both with you.’
‘No, you don’t understand.’ She looked at them, these kind women, these friends Howard had brought into her life. ‘I called them.’
‘The locksmith?’ asked Faye, confused.
‘No… the developer.’
Margot’s face fell. ‘What did you tell them?’
‘They’re coming to do a valuation. In the morning. It was arranged before I could say what I really wanted.’
‘And what’s that?’ Faye asked.
‘I… I don’t know. I thought I’d find out if the valuation is the same. Then take it from there.’ She didn’t miss the look of disappointment on Margot’s face, on Faye’s. In the short time they’d been here they’d fallen in love with the bookshop as much as the locals had. They had, after all, known just what it meant to Howard.
‘I’ve messed up.’ She slumped down on the stool by the phone. ‘What have I done?’
Margot crouched down and put her hands over Bonnie’s. ‘You haven’t done anything wrong. We all understand how hard this is for you. Now, one step at a time, eh?’
‘One step at a time,’ she repeated.
Margot got back up again and picked up the bag filled with eating paraphernalia. ‘Step one is to help Iris.’
‘Help Iris,’ Bonnie repeated. It felt like the only thing she could do.
Faye took the keys to the shop, Bonnie took Midas’s lead, and they all filed out of the cottage.
Midas nudged Bonnie’s hand with his head as she waited for Faye to close the gate behind them and, by her side, he escorted her down the hill into Driftwick Bay and towards the shop she hadn’t set foot in since her husband died.
When they arrived at the bookshop the lighting was down low and Bonnie stayed on the pavement with Midas while Faye opened up.
She could do this. She could step over the threshold.
And now she was no longer thinking about it or worrying because Midas had taken the decision out of her hands and was leading the way.
She stepped inside and the warmth embraced her. She knew it wasn’t possible, but the smell reminded her of Howard. Perhaps it was the aroma of books, a scent she’d always associated with the man she’d loved so dearly. A man she missed so much.
Margot closed the door behind them and over in the story corner laid out the blanket Bonnie had thought to pack around the plates. Faye was sorting out the food and Bonnie, well Bonnie was taking it all in until Midas shuffled and she realised she still hadn’t taken off his lead.
‘Sorry, boy.’ She removed it. ‘There you go, you’re free. But no eating the food.’
‘I’ve got the bag of treats,’ said Margot emerging from the back. She pulled one out for Midas so he had something while they sat down to their takeaway.
‘I feel bad eating in here,’ said Bonnie, daring to look around them as they began to enjoy their food. She hadn’t thought she was hungry what with the guilt over her phone call, the dread of tomorrow.
‘Let’s think of ourselves as part of an adventure,’ Faye suggested, ‘like Howard did when he came to book club.’
