“Come on, Trevor. This is me. What are you going to do?”
He gave in. “Nothing. What can I do? Jedidiah called it off.” Again. Right after having astounding sex with him. Which, if he thought too much about it, pissed him off royally. “She quit the job. She’d probably move out of Whiskey River if she could.”
“Neither of you look happy. You should try to get back together.”
“How? Didn’t you hear me? She’s done.”
“Hmm. She doesn’t look like she is any more than you do.”
“She says she loves me but she can’t be with me. Have you ever heard of anything so stupid?”
“Convince her she’s wrong.”
“Gee, why didn’t I think of that?”
Will ignored that jibe. “You know Mel and I broke up once.”
“No, I had no idea. When?”
“Not long before we got married. But I figured out I was never going to be happy without her, and she felt the same, so we worked it out.”
“That’s very touching, Will, but I don’t see how it relates to me. Besides, I don’t think she wants to work it out.”
Will put his elbows on the table and steepled his fingers. “What’s the problem between you?”
Hell, he might as well tell the man. “The main problem is she thinks I take too many chances. She’s afraid something will happen to me. Because of the shooting. That’s what freaked her out.” And because of her late fiancé, not that he could mention that.
“Oh, because you and Justin did your hero thing?”
“Damn it, I’m no hero. Why do people say that?”
“Because you kinda are. If you love her, and it sure looks like you do, then you should do whatever it takes to get her back.”
“So I should quit something I love doing, something worthwhile, let down kids I’ve made promises to all because Jedidiah is being completely unreasonable?”
Not only was Ricky’s trial coming up but when he’d arrived at the initiation he learned that the inductee was a beautiful little redheaded girl of about seven. Even though her hair was red and not auburn, she reminded him of Jedidiah. Except Jedidiah had a good relationship with her family and had never been abused.
“You have a point. But if you don’t quit what are you going to do?”
“I guess I have to trust that she’ll change her mind. That she’ll realize she’s irrational about this. I can’t change who I am for her.” But could Jedidiah change? Could she let go of her irrational fear? He didn’t know.
Could he live with himself if he quit BFK? What did that say for their relationship if that was the only way he could be with Jedidiah?
Ricky had been there with his new foster mom, Julie. He’d wanted to know where Jedidiah was. Trevor had made up some bullshit that seemed to satisfy him but Julie shot him a glance that pretty much called him on it.
*
Jedidiah didn’t usuallydrink alone. She’d have an occasional beer or glass of wine by herself, but if she drank more than one she was with someone. But tonight was different. Because today she’d realized when she saw Trevor at Jalisco’s what an idiot she’d been. She loved Trevor and he loved her. But had that been enough for her? No. She’d wanted to change him. Change his basic nature, which was that of a man who runs toward danger and not away from it. She was surprised he hadn’t chosen another profession when he left the military. Something like being a cop, or a fireman, or an EMT. But he’d gone into app design.
Which meant he wasn’t chasing the high. He’d had enough of adrenaline-seeking. His involvement with BFK was because he wanted to help the kids. Kids who, but for the grace of God, could have been him. That was admirable, and she did admire him. If she were honest with herself she’d admit that Damaris was right. She’d fallen for Trevorbecauseof the sort of man he was. So she could either accept the entire man, who might get into a dangerous situation but who didn’t seek out those situations. Or not, and be miserable knowing she pushed the best thing that ever happened to her out of her life.
She’d just finished her second glass of wine and was contemplating a third when someone pounded on her door.
“Jedidiah, open up.”
Trevor. What was he doing here?
“Let me in, Jedidiah. I need to talk to you.”
